Lady worker leaving meeting: You guys just aren’t as skilled as I am in the Porn Names Department.
McDonald’s Drive
Oakbrook, Illinois
Overheard by: Brett C
Lady worker leaving meeting: You guys just aren’t as skilled as I am in the Porn Names Department.
McDonald’s Drive
Oakbrook, Illinois
Overheard by: Brett C
Office lackey #1: I need some experience before I apply to pharmacy school.
Office lackey #2: Have you considered a crack den?
Office lackey #1, thoughtfully: I wonder what UIC would think of that. “I interned at a meth lab last summer…”
DePaul University
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: University Lackey
Sensitive soul: She’s gotten heavier, so now I can beat her.
Central Street
Evanston, Illinois
Male coworker #1 on conference call: You don't want to blow your credibility right out of the gate.
Male coworker #2: Let me tell you, I blow credibility every day.
Chicago, Illinois
Rep on phone: You ever hear of a mojito? Well, I just created a new drink: the bro-jito.
10 S. Riverside Plaza
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Syd O’Banion
Cube dweller #1: How was your weekend?
Cube dweller #2: It was good! I went to the movies… Oh, and my mom said I could stop taking the medication she gave me.
Chicago, Illinois
Employee to boss: Your compliments feel better than most people's compliments…
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: chickago
Cube dweller #1, at weekly company breakfast: Oooh, breakfast. I forgot today was breakfast day.
Cube dweller #2: They sure do know how to buy us off. They could take away our chairs and there would only be a minor grumbling, but if they took away our breakfast… Like, ‘Yeah, we’re gonna be a standing agency now.’ ‘Yeah, that’s cool. Just don’t mess with my breakfast.’
233 North Michigan Avenue
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Cube Monkey
Broker #1: Ok, here’s one: would you rather lick the bulge on Johnny’s* leg or eat the skin that Peter* peeled off his foot last year?
Broker #2: As sick as this sounds, I’d take Johnny’s bulge in a second. I had to sit next to Peter. His foot had a crack in it so deep you could stick a pencil in it.
440 South LaSalle
Chicago, Illinois
