Coworkers

Blonde mom returning to the workforce: Can you help me send a fax?
Office coworker: Sure, what do you need help with?
Mom: Well, I need to send out this fax, but I also need to keep a copy of it, how do I do that?

Northwestern Highway
Southfield, Michigan

Coworker: King Tut's tomb didn't make you sick, moron, it was eating all the testicles!

Dayton, Ohio

Girl at desk: My friend told me about how they paid two grand to freeze the stem cells from her son’s umbilical cord so it could save his life or something later.
Guy at desk: Why don’t they just have him drink the fluid out of the umbilical cord?
Male coworker: Orrr they could just put the stuff in the freezer.

3111 S. Range Line Road
Joplin, Missouri

Peon #1: Jimmmy, you got a haircut. Very aerodynamic.
Peon #2: I sure did. All the better for walking quickly down the hallway!

Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: JWa

Office clerk: Wait, this doesn’t look right.
Manager: It has to be right -it’s highlighted.
Office clerk: Maybe someone highlighted the wrong thing, because that’s not right.
Manager: I highlighted it.
Office clerk: Well, I think it may be wrong.
Manager: It can’t be wrong. It’s highlighted.

5th Avenue
Portland, Oregon

Overheard by: Saw the Light

Male coworker: The first time I shit in school was in eleventh grade. It was during Chemistry, after gym class. It was on that day I became a man. Since then I’ll shit anywhere, basically.

1372 Broadway
New York, New York

Overheard by: ILmatic

Annoying cubette: So I say to him: “Look at Lucy*’s toes. Now look at John*’s toes.” And he’s like: “What?” And then he looks and sees he’s got seven of them and he’s like: “Wahhhh!”
Sane cubette: How many cats do you have?

Morris Plains, New Jersey

Overheard by: intern in the next cube

Meeting chairperson: Alright, that’s about all for this Monday’s meeting. Now, is anyone going to be away on vacation at all this week?
Suit #1: I’ll be taking next Monday off. We’re heading up to the cottage for the weekend.
Suit #2: Umm, I will be sick on Friday so I won’t be in.

Meadowvale Business Park
Mississauga, Ontario
Canadia

Coworker #1: He’s not gay, he’s a pedophile.
Coworker #2: There’s a difference?

Hickson Road
Sydney
Australia

Overheard by: H.

Co-worker on phone: Uh yes, this is [Brett Myers} with the Mortgage Company. It’s Wednesday, 10:30 AM…I’m sorry! It’s just that…well, you sounded like a voicemail voice.

1350 Deming Way
Middleton, Wisconsin