Co-worker #1: So how’s your belly button?
Co-worker #2: Um…it’s okay.
Co-worker #1: You know my dad’s scar looks like he has 3 belly buttons.
Co-worker #2: Oh yeah? Well, my friend’s isn’t even in the right place. It’s like way down here.
Intern #1: So it’s like she has a extra vag?
Intern #2: This is like the weirdest thing I’ve heard at work.
600 Water Street SW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: ADS
Worker #1: I am thinking about going to medical school sometime.
Worker #2: I’m pretty sure you couldn’t handle medicine…
Worker #1: Just for that I’m going to be a medicine!
Worker #2: What?
1166 Gorham Street
Newmarket, Ontario
Canadia
Drone #1: Hey, [Mark]?
Drone #2: Yeah?
Drone #1: You leave yet?
Drone #2: Nope, still here.
388 Greenwich Street
New York, NY
Overheard by: Cranium S. Leeking
Co-worker #1: How do people get mirrors to stay on the ceiling?
Co-worker #2: Not sure.
Co-worker #3: We used rubber cement. We put up a few four foot square mirrors, without frames.
Co-worker #1: Rubber cement? Did it hold good?
Co-worker #3: They’ve stayed up for four years, but my husband is too afraid to have sex without being covered with a blanket. He thinks they might fall and cut his dick off.
4150 Belden Village Street NW
North Canton, Ohio
Overheard by: Kyosho
Attendee #1: Can it be programmed so our office and cell phones ring simultaneously?
Attendee #2: What do you mean by simultaneously?
2901 West Alameda Avenue
Burbank, California
Overheard by: Rachel Marie
Team Leader: Well, you know I always have to be right, don’t you?
Employee: You’re lucky to have stayed married all of these years.
Team Leader: Yes, well my wife is a very patient woman.
Employee: Either that or deaf.
14840 Conference Center Drive
Chantilly, Virginia
Overheard by: Jen Foster
Designer: All right. V & S Courier will pick up those CDs this afternoon.
Writer: “V & S”? What is that, Venereal and Syphillis?
Designer: I think so. And like venereal and syphillis, they are always traveling back and forth. From customer to customer.
16430 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona
Worker #1: Wow, is that the moon over there?
Worker #2: No, no, that’s the sun.
16530 Commerce Court
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: matt
Co-worker #1: We have so much more room in the office now, [Erin] and I can dance.
Boss: Let’s see you dance
Co-worker #2: Naw, she can’t do it without a pole.
50 Public Square
Cleveland, Ohio
