Co-worker #1: You starting your transformation into Bob Dole?
Co-worker #2: Yeah, I already have a sore wrist.
1001 I Street
Sacramento, California
Co-worker #1: You starting your transformation into Bob Dole?
Co-worker #2: Yeah, I already have a sore wrist.
1001 I Street
Sacramento, California
Male bank teller: I’m winning the Mega Millions tonight.
Female bank teller: I’m getting a brace for my leg.
Male teller: Screw that brace. When I win the Mega Millions we’ll get you a new leg! We’ll just cut that one off and I’ll get you a prostate.
725 East Big Beaver Road
Troy, Michigan
Brit #1: What the fuck is her problem anyway?
Brit #2: She’s doing that thing.
Brit #1: What thing?
Brit #2: That Canadian thing where they pretend to be all nice because they’re from Canada when really, [putting on Canadian accent] they’re just, like, totally backstabbing dipshits, eh?’ I mean what kind of idiots would settle in a place where it hits minus 30, anyway?
V Parku
Prague, Czech Republic
Co-Worker #1: What does “cosmopolitan” mean?
Co-Worker #2: It means, like, “worldly.”
Co-Worker #1: [blank stare]
Co-Worker #2: You know, like in Sex and the City.
415 South Street
Waltham, Massachusetts
Female co-worker: Oww, my ovaries are falling out.
Male co-worker: Do you want some glue?
720 Washington Avenue
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Receptionist: Hey, did Kevin leave?
Co-worker: No, he’s gone for the day.
16443 Minnesota Avenue
Paramount, California
Overheard by: Stella Bella
Worker: I like my shirt, but I’m afraid my boobs are going to fall out. Which would be fine somewhere else, but not here. That’s how I feel about all my clothes: “great for not here.”
3900 West Alameda Avenue
Burbank, California
Employee #1: Kinda ridiculous that a George Foreman mini-grill is able to take down power for half of the floor.
Employee #2: Dude, you’re grilling in the office and you’re going to talk about what’s ridiculous?
1899 L Street NW
Washington, DC
Worker on phone: I don’t care if you threw up or not, I’m not canceling that dentist appointment…Well, take some Tums and go anyway. If you have to throw up again, throw up on them; who cares?
321 Norristown Road
Ambler, Pennsylvania
Co-worker #1: So how’s your belly button?
Co-worker #2: Um…it’s okay.
Co-worker #1: You know my dad’s scar looks like he has 3 belly buttons.
Co-worker #2: Oh yeah? Well, my friend’s isn’t even in the right place. It’s like way down here.
Intern #1: So it’s like she has a extra vag?
Intern #2: This is like the weirdest thing I’ve heard at work.
600 Water Street SW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: ADS