Concerned mother on phone: My son just informed me that the room deposits are due tomorrow.
Secretary: Yes.
Mother: But I’m in Germany, and if I mailed in the money it would take two weeks.
Secretary: Your son could pay with a debit card or cash.
Mother: I gave him a debit card and he lost it.
Secretary: Uh-huh.
Mother: … My son is a goddamned idiot.
Virginia
Female designer: If you show up, you can watch me use your hard drive.
IT guy: Ummm…
44 Canal Center Plaza
Alexandria, Virginia
Scared CSR: Someone just blew up the bathroom!
Marshall Street
Richmond, Virginia
Coworker #1: So you can swallow it all right? You don't have to keep spitting out every sample, do you?
Coworker #2: No… You can swallow.
Lorton, Virginia
Coworker: So, you went hunting last night?
Cube neighbor: Yup.
Coworker: Do you gut the deer yourself?
Cube neighbor: Yup.
Coworker: So… I guess you know what the inside of a human looks like, then, right?
701 East Byrd Street
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Did she just say that?
Boss, setting down ancient computing equipment: I don’t know what’s going to happen when I turn this on. Hopefully it won’t catch on fire…
Minion: Then why is it on my desk?
Tyco Road
Vienna, Virginia
Overheard by: Hiding behind the bookshelves
Boss: Spring is in the air. I’ll be outside for the next 15 minutes reviewing this paper. If any urgent crisis happens, don’t tell me.
308 West Freemason Street
Norfolk, Virginia
Male database administrator: She said she'd do all of my hookings for the next year and a half!
Chesapeake, Virginia
Overheard by: Lady Ash
Drone #1: I wonder how many modifications it would take to convert an old Beetle to Darth Vader’s helmet?
Drone #2: Probably not too many.
Metro Park
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: I want one.
Supervisor to staff member: Leave me alone or I will spit my nastiness on you.
Mclean, Virginia
