Analyst: I don't know if that STD was news to you, but..
Developer: Uh, it is now.
Commerce Park
Reston, Virginia
Overheard by: Not in that division
Analyst: I don't know if that STD was news to you, but..
Developer: Uh, it is now.
Commerce Park
Reston, Virginia
Overheard by: Not in that division
Coworker #1, holding small letter opener: Do you have one of these, only smaller?
Coworker #2: What's wrong with that one?
Coworker #1: It's too thick. I can't fit in in the smaller slits and it tears the whole thing apart most of the time.
Coworker #3: I had a boyfriend like that once.
Coworker #2: What the fuck?
Santa Ana, California
Overheard by: errica
Employee: So, how was your night?
Boss: I played catcher last night, so now my butt's killing me!
Employee: Um, you're talking about the softball game, right?
Denver, Colorado
Woman at office party: She's got that psychological syndrome where she uses sex to get what she wants from men… What do they call that again?
Man: A whore.
Dario's Restaurant
Rockville Centre, New York
Overheard by: Big Larry
Office peon: If I moved out to Phoenix I'd probably need a motorcycle. Taking advantage of the weather and…women and stuff.
Decatur, Illinois
Overheard by: Kelli
President: Let me tell you what, this is about Hank. You know how when you have a bunch of buddies over to make clam chowder, but it never tastes as good as when you make it yourself? That's what I'm talking about Hank. You've got to have just one guy in control of the paprika.
Sonora Court
Sunnyvale, California
Store manager: You don't want to get this bitter and angry from having this obsession over counting your holes!
Houston, Texas
Overheard by: it's true, I don't
(director of sales and marketing flips off female programmer)
Female programmer: Don't even finger me!
(rampant laughter)
Keene, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Monkey
Store employee on break to another: So I was like, “let's pretend we live on an oil rig and have known each other for the past 15 years!”
Toronto
Canadia
Male supervisor: So pretty much I think I'm not going to eat before I do it anymore.
Female supervisor: I agree, I never have sex after I eat: that's why if you take me out to dinner you can pretty much guarantee I won't put out! I mean, I might get a cramp.
Lakeport, California
