Director: You were wearing a tube top and you *still* got a ticket?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Director: You were wearing a tube top and you *still* got a ticket?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Manager who has been in the office all week: Uh, yeah, yeah. Sorry, I haven't gotten that to you. Yeah, I know you need it. I haven't been home, I've been traveling.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: liz
Manager, just after he finishes dialing phone: I’m calling ol’ big tits.
Female voice: Uh, hello?
Manager: Oh… Hi. Who is this?
Female voice, angrily: This is ‘big tits,’ apparently.
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Straight cube-dweller, about hole punch: Well, it shouldn't go there. It should be out in the open on the desk where I can see it.
Gay cube-dweller: What, you couldn't see it sitting there?
Straight cube-dweller: Well, it lives on my desk, not in the closet.
Gay cube-dweller: It's a shelf above your desk, not a closet.
Straight cube-dweller: Well, you would know more about closets than shelves, wouldn't you?
West Lafayette, Indiana
CSR: Don't you and your husband ever take a shower together?
Supervisor: Are you kidding? After all these years? We don't even fit! Well, we fit, but our feet wouldn't get wet!
Indianapolis, Indiana
Customer #1: I don't know how she thinks she's hot.
Customer #2: Who?
Customer #1: Sweet tits.
Customer #2: (mumbles obscenities)
Customer #1: Well, I don't know what to tell you, you're the one who always dates mean, nasty women.
Target
Evansville, Indiana
Overheard by: REDman
Business owner: Thanks for e-mailing me that report so I could work on it at home… But I don't think I'll be doing that any more.
Receptionist: Why not?
Business owner: Well, my computer here is set so that when you go back and make changes, it just moves things along. My computer at home just erases what is already there and replaces it. So, every time I found a typo or made a change, I had to re-type the whole rest of the report.
Receptionist: You… You are kidding?
Business owner: Yeah, I bet I typed that thing eight times after I found all the typos and stuff.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Co-worker #1: You mean Napoleon Dynamite?
Co-worker #2: No, Napoleon Bonaparte.
Co-worker #1: Was he that explorer guy?
Co-worker #2: No, he was a French general…if you’ve ever heard the phrase “Napoleon complex” that’s where it comes from, because he was a short guy who thought he was the shit…
Co-worker #1: Oh…I’ve never heard of him.
Co-worker #2: How’s that IU education working out for you?
3699 West Lathrop
South Bend, Indiana
Coworker at bar: Shit, a degree doesn't mean anything! I'm dumber than a box of rocks and I have a degree!
Indianapolis, Indiana
Mom, as toddler runs into doorway: Look out, Helen Keller!
E Hadley Road
Indiana
Overheard by: Amanda
