Boss on phone: I was thinking about trying one of those vibrating condoms…Yeah, i’ve heard they are really great…Yeah, reusable. At least I’d re-use them, I’m not paying $15 for one time!…Yeah, I know. I just need to find a guy. I was thinking of calling [Keith] to see what he’s doing on the weekend.
113 Wicks Road
North Ryde, New South Wales
Australia
Media agency lady: Yeah, I met one of your constituents last week.
Sales rep: Well, that would be Ted*, I’m guessing.
Media agency lady: No, it was some sweet young thing.
Sales rep: Oh, well, then that would be Mindy*.
Media agency lady, laughing: Yeah, it was Mindy. Mindy is a piece of work [laughs harder].
Sales rep, chuckling nervously: Wow, that makes me want to ask you so many questions!
Media agency lady, wiping tears from her eyes: Yeah, I bet it does… None of which I would answer, but the fact that you want to ask them should tell you something.
Louisville, Kentucky
Boss to client on phone: I walked her home every day for months because I thought she was blind!
1430 Massachusetts Avenue
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Coworker #1: Did you see Amy's orange and black leopard print top?
Coworker #2: Yeah.
Coworker #1: She looks like Halloween!
Coworker #2: Or a whore.
Washington, DC
Worker guy: Ya know, my wife and I have a parakeet that just will not die!
Mayland Drive
Richmond, Virginia
Boss, talking about bad ex-employee: Dick was a real pain in the ass.
1900 Avenue of the Stars
Century City, California
Overheard by: JuliaTastic
Female coworker: I do a dry rub followed up with a vinegar wash.
Portland, Oregon
Office liar: The Navy hires very conservative people to captain nuclear submarines.
Male coworker: Really?
Office liar: Yeah, every nuclear submarine captain I’ve ever met has been very level-headed.
Female coworker: How many nuclear submarine captains have you met?
Office liar: Hundreds!
West Loop
Chicago, Illinois
Receptionist: Yeah, the Deals Team all have babies about the same age. They must have just all at once started procrastinating like bunnies!
30 Warwick Street
London
England
Overheard by: Supertemp
Teacher #1: My dad hit a deer once!
Teacher #2: Oh, really?! Did it die?
Teacher #1: Yeah, and it totally wrecked the car, too.
Teacher #2: My dad hit a cow!
Teacher #1: Oh… Well, my dad hit a whale!
Bexhill College
England
Overheard by: Corinne
