Manager: Yeah, so at this new salon I can get my hair highlighted for $120, and that includes the shampoo, haircut, and blow job.
Bethesda, Maryland
Manager: Yeah, so at this new salon I can get my hair highlighted for $120, and that includes the shampoo, haircut, and blow job.
Bethesda, Maryland
Waitress: I ate so many pork sausages yesterday at the picnic, when I fart it sounds like a pig squealing [makes loud squealing sounds over and over].
Waiter: Did you used to be a guy or something?
Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: Shatmandu
Boss, to friend: So then I took her out to my car and let little Spiderman fire his web shooter all over her fa…
Employee, from back in the stockroom: Aaaaaaaaaaaaarghh! Jesus Christ, I'm quitting.
Hot Topic
West Virginia
Overheard by: oh dear
Assistant: Oh my god, your caulk is dripping!
5001 East Harry Street
Wichita, Kansas
Worker lady: This year is my last birthday.
Post office, 10 Atlantic Street
Newark, New Jersey
Lady #1: … But he’s drunk all the time.
Lady #2: Everyone’s drunk all the time. I might be drunk right now!
8140 Lehigh Avenue
Morton Grove, Illinois
Overheard by: Amanda
Old lady on cell: Well, I went commando once, but the whole day I was just super paranoid. What if it got flies in it or something?
3501 Quail Springs Parkway
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Old woman at check-in desk: I used to have a lot more sex when I was younger… There weren’t any TVs back then.
Main Street
Wolfville, Nova Scotia
Canadia
Office drone: If we die it’ll be because of those Altoids.
3229 East Spring Street
Los Angeles, California
Co-worker #1 walks by [Seth].
Co-worker #1: Hi!
Seth: …
Co-worker #1: Yo, what’s the deal with [Seth]? That guy is a straight up tower shooter.
4 Airport Park Boulevard
Latham, New York
Overheard by: Nathan
