Guy #1: Have you spoken with [Jon]?
Guy #2: No, it’s like trying to get hold of God.
1000 Great West Road
Brentwood, Middlesex
UK
Overheard by: saffainlondon
Guy #1: Have you spoken with [Jon]?
Guy #2: No, it’s like trying to get hold of God.
1000 Great West Road
Brentwood, Middlesex
UK
Overheard by: saffainlondon
Manager: Will you guys stop talking during my presentation?
Underling: I wasn’t talking, I was asleep…
Abingdon Science Park
Abingdon, Oxfordshire
UK
Project Manager: He said this, and we thought he meant that, and he thought we were doing this, and they thought we were doing that, and they didn’t tell us they wanted that so we did this…and it all got lost in the…in the…in the big washing machine of communication.
Developer: Or possibly the tumble drier of tautology.
1-4 Warple Way
Acton, London
Agent: [Kevin], there’s a call for you.
[Kevin]: Who would it be?
Agent: Duh, it’d be the person on the other end of the phone!
15-17 St Johns
Worcester, Worcestershire
UK
Overheard by: mark nice
Engineer: Ew! Megan Fox's thumbs look like toes!
Technician: Yeah, but I bet they don't taste like toes!
Warrington
England
Overheard by: jon drake
Student to friends: Ginger people are just… weird.
Ludlow
England
Overheard by: jonty bonty
Estimator to engineer: Yeah, but if I put that in the system it'll laugh its tits off at me.
Warrington
England
Overheard by: jon
Historian: Why are we in academia?
Bio-chemist: Because we weren't good enough to join the circus.
Oxford
England
Manager to duty worker: Oh, and tell them we've got a few babies flying around so expect a call from us next week.
Sheffield
England
Puzzled IT worker holding tortilla in one hand and piece of raw cod in the other: So what you're saying is that this isn't sushi?
Coworker: It's not sushi.
IT worker: But it's raw fish!
Coworker: Well, sushi is a special kind of way of preparing it. That's just a piece of cod you bought from the fishmongers, wrapped in a tortilla.
IT worker: So… I shouldn't eat it?
Coworker: No… This is like the jam incident, isn't it?
IT worker: Fuck you! Jam is healthy–there's bloody fruit in it!
Coworker: And you wonder why you're single…
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
