Agent: How do I reset the copier?
Assistant: Press the Reset button.
Agent: Which one is the Reset button?
Assistant: The big yellow one labeled “Reset”.
Agent: Oh.
16501 Ventura Boulevard
Encino, California
Agent: How do I reset the copier?
Assistant: Press the Reset button.
Agent: Which one is the Reset button?
Assistant: The big yellow one labeled “Reset”.
Agent: Oh.
16501 Ventura Boulevard
Encino, California
Office girl: I know she’s somewhere but not here right now.
555 Broadway
New York, NY
Worker #1: Yeahs I’s got you.
Worker #2: You sure?
Worker #1: Yeahs I’s saids I’s got you, I’s got you.
Worker #2: Then why are you looking at me so stupid like?
1 Penn Plaza
New York, NY
Coworker #1: What’s with the Google logo today?
Coworker #2: It’s probably supposed to be symbolic of Terry Schiavo dehydrating or something.
1001 W. Cypress Creek Road
Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Woman: Yeah, I managed to get rid of him by telling him that he needed someone to surgically remove the stick that’s up his ass, but that we don’t do that here in this office, so…
626 Thayer Road
West Point, New York
Girl: …did you go to Overheard in the Office? It said, “Helpful Co-worker: Does anyone want anything from Starbucks? Tired Co-worker: Yeah, get me a triple iced mocha with a shot of crack in it.”
Guy: That sounds delicious, although I don’t think baking soda tastes so good.
Girl: Believe it or not, I’ve actually tried baking soda–for heartburn. Works great, tastes like ass.
Guy: Are you for real? Think of the wonders crack must do for heartburn, then.
Girl: What heartburn? You don’t eat anything while you’re on crack!
Guy: By the way, your last comment was Overheard in the Office worthy.
1201 Broadway
New York, NY
Co-worker #1: Peter? Since when do you go by Peter?
Pete: Well, it was a more formal thing, so we used that.
Co-worker #1: I’m not used to seeing Peter.
Co-worker #2: That’s not what we heard.
5450 Frantz Road
Dublin, Ohio
Worker #1: If we work here much longer, we are going to die and go straight to hell.
Worker #2: Oh, yeah? Check the address on your business card…where did you think you’ve been working?
Worker #1: Oh! Well, that explains the lack of promotion, compensation, benefits, office politics and your dead-man’s tan!
Worker #2: Close, but the “tan” is from the fluorescent lights.
Worker #1: Hell is as hell does.
800 Boylston Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Coworker: Those people in the Tsunami, they deserved to die. They were being greedy, collecting fish from the sea…they should have known there are three phases of a Tsunami.
60 Livingston Avenue
St. Paul, Minnesota
Helpful Co-worker: Does anyone want anything from Starbucks?
Tired Co-worker: Yeah, get me a triple iced mocha with a shot of crack
in it.
827 Fort Street
Honolulu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Jade Shiroma
