Cubicle girl #1: Damn! No toilet paper!
Cubicle girl #2, hesistantly: No. None in here, either.
Cubicle girl #1: Argh, I'll just have to wiggle. (pause) I hate wiggling! (pause) Only boys should have to wiggle.
Girls' Toilets
England
Overheard by: Disturbed Toilet User
CSR on phone with customer: I'm sorry, sir, but we don't cover vehicles outside the United States.
(five minutes later)
CSR to coworker: I think I told the customer the wrong thing. Is Hawaii part of the United States?
Southington, Connecticut
Colleague: I'm so tired all the time, man. I must have necrophilia.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: I know Latin
Lady in cube on phone: Hey, where's a good place to buy dad a new holster for his .38? (pause) No! I got him bullets last year!
Aliso Viejo, California
Office lesbian: (suddenly starts sniffing the air)
Office straight girl: It's me…
Office lesbian: (nods and resumes working)
Fort Mill, South Carolina
Waitress #1, to customer: I've tried that before, except I don't really like runny eggs, so I usually don't get it. It's good, though. Poached eggs look too much like an abortion. (pauses) I probably shouldn't have said that…
Waitress #2, overhearing: Wait, what looks like an abortion?
Waitress #1: Poached eggs.
Waitress #2: Oh. (pause) Yeah, they do.
Café
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I wouldn't know. I've never had one.
Woman peon: I think she’s okay. She got serviced…
11th Street NW
Washington, DC
Manager: She was an elephant trainer in Thailand.
Assistant: Oh yeah, like that’s hard. Eat the peanut, bitch! [makes a whip gesture and cracking sound.]
Kirkwood, Missouri
Overheard by: Matt
PR lady #1: I have nuts.
PR lady #2: That’s great, because I have a penis.
658 Church Street
Richmond, Victoria
Australia
Overheard by: Louise
