9AM It’s Like a Welcome Mat

Co-worker: Does the whole building smell like urine? Or is it just my cube?

1601 Chestnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Posted on December 17, 2020
Coworkers, Gripes, Pennsylvania, Questions, Restroom, Sensory Experiences

Take What, Exactly? No, Don't Tell Me.

Cute gay guy: Tome Cruise and Katie Holmes were looking for an apartment on my street.
Female coworker: Oh, really?
Cute gay guy: Yeah, I live on Toorak Road. If they move there, I wanna steal Suri. And have crazy bum sex on my balcony! (demonstrates by thrusting in the air) Take that, Scientology!

Melbourne
Australia

Overheard by: Giggling

Posted on December 14, 2020
Australia, Cinema, Coworkers, Gays and lesbians, Religion, Sexuality, Wishes

Career Tip: Find Out Which Colleagues Not to Joke With. And Don't.

Coworker #1: It was amazing. He was the first blind man to climb mount Everest. He was in the news and everything.
Coworker #2: Did they say anything about his dog?
Coworker #1: What?

Waterloo
Ontario
Canadia

Overheard by: Meesh

Posted on December 14, 2020
Animals, Canadia, Coworkers, Questions, Sports

This Is How #2 Gets His Proofreading Done for Free

Coworker #1: Have you filed your travel voucher for that conference in Indianapolis?
Coworker #2: Yes.
Coworker #1: Let me see your copy so I can fill mine out correctly.
Coworker #2: Here you go.
Coworker #1: Let’s see. You used the year ’05 instead of ’06, did not provide departure/arrival times, omitted your social security number, and didn’t total the round trip mileage and mileage reimbursement columns. Thanks.

4555 Central Avenue
Columbus, Indiana

Posted on December 11, 2020
Comebacks, Coworkers, Default, Indiana, Questions, Travel

It's Basically Like a Cell Phone in Virginia

Office drone #1: I see you've got a machete.
Office drone #2, wistfully: Who doesn't, in this workaday world?

Williamsburg, Virginia

Overheard by: Stunned into silence

Posted on December 8, 2020
Coworkers, Office Politics, Violence, Virginia

Let's Just Say the Body Shots Got a Little Out of Hand

Female coworker: Hey there, sweetie. Did you have fun yesterday?
Male coworker: Huh?
Female coworker: You had the day off, didn't you?
Male coworker: I was at a funeral. My grandmother died.

Westlake
Seattle, Washington

Posted on December 8, 2020
Coworkers, Death, Family, Questions, Washington

He Brings Out the Worst in Me and Enjoys It

20-something in scrubs #1: The one I really like is Jared*.
20-something in scrubs #2: Jared?
20-something in scrubs #1: Yeah. When we’re together I can really control him.

Hospital, 399 Bathurst Street
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia

Posted on December 4, 2020
Canadia, Coworkers, Gossip

A Glimpse of Shapely Ankles Cost Oswald His Composure

Lady on phone: No, he did not get in. He did make an attempt, but things went south from there… I was wearing my skirt with the slit up the side. Nooo, you can only see somethin’ when I am sitting down… Because I am a lady.

18th and L Street NW
Washington, DC