Auditor: What is a ‘Dutch Auction Tender Offer’? Is that where they go to Dutch and have an auction? … Where is Dutch?
Parham Road
Richmond, Virginia
Auditor: What is a ‘Dutch Auction Tender Offer’? Is that where they go to Dutch and have an auction? … Where is Dutch?
Parham Road
Richmond, Virginia
CCA: So, I have to get some KY jelly for my puppy. I’ve never really lubricated a dog’s rectum before, you know?
Sackville, New Brunswick
Canadia
Managing editor, on drug screening: We even test the interns. I was shocked by that. I thought everyone just assumed they were stoned all the time.
Newspaper office
Ohio
Overheard by: I didn’t get the job
Partner: If you’re busy making a baby, tell me that. I just want to know who is available.
Tysons Corner
Virginia
Male flight attendant: Okay, folks, one last time — please turn your cell phones off. If the person next to you is talking on their phone, smack ’em! That should teach them.
Southwest flight 1911 to Oakland, California
Overheard by: Katie
Male VP: We'll beat it off for now.
Female general counsel: We'll beat it off for the next five years.
Consultant: That's probably the longest we can beat it off for.
Female general counsel: And then I'll retire.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: If I so much as smile, I'll get fired.
Career woman: Last year I couldn’t even spell consultant, and now I is one.
Two Penn Plaza
New York, NY
Overheard by: Michelle Sydney Levy
HR lady: I remember your name. What’s your name?
School
Fairfield, Ohio
Presenter: Right, so not only do you have to help each other, but you also have to service your members.
Hotel
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: really bored
