Guy on phone waiting for other end to pick up: If I’m going to get caught embezzling, it’s not going to be at a nonprofit– [other end picks up] –Hi, Deborah*!
San Francisco, California
Guy on phone waiting for other end to pick up: If I’m going to get caught embezzling, it’s not going to be at a nonprofit– [other end picks up] –Hi, Deborah*!
San Francisco, California
Legal assistant #1: Do you know Andy Samberg?
Legal assistant #2: Yes.
Legal assistant #1: What was his other song? Not “I'm on a boat”…
Legal assistant #2: “Jizz in my pants”?
Legal assistant #1: Oh, I thought it was “jizz on my face”. Wait… Am I on speakerphone?
Legal assistant #2: Yes.
(office erupts in laughter)
Irvine, California
Overheard by: Legal Amusement
Man on street: Seriously, if I make one wrong keystroke, the whole company could go out of business.
corner of 2nd & Howard
San Francisco, California
(sound of whip cracking)
Next cubicle coworker: Ahh, my eye!
Mission Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ian
Boss: Well, what can I say? I love my home planet.
1480 64th Street
Emeryville, California
Overheard by: Eve S. Dropper
Boss, shouting from neighboring office: Oh my god, I love those mugshots!
Los Angeles, California
Supervisor to associate, about smell complaints: Maybe it's something in your drawers… Umm…I mean your desk drawers.
Rancho Cucamonga, California
IT server guy on cell: Yeah, it'll get really huge, and it'll stay like that for awhile…
Santa Clara, California
Overheard by: braingauis
Salesman: It’s this whole ‘No Child Left Behind, let’s get all the kids to graduate college’ bullshit. If everybody goes to college, who’s gonna do the work? Huh? Who’s gonna dig the ditches? Who’s gonna pick up the trash? We don’t need that. We need kids to drop out of school and do the work.
Birch Street
Brea, California
Suit on cell: I’m going home and changing into shorts. It’s so hot out there I need to throw up.
Washington Mutual
Livermore, California
Overheard by: Stephen
