Male supervisor: So pretty much I think I'm not going to eat before I do it anymore.
Female supervisor: I agree, I never have sex after I eat: that's why if you take me out to dinner you can pretty much guarantee I won't put out! I mean, I might get a cramp.
Lakeport, California
Worker #1: I mean, I just want to tell them I can't make them feel better. *Bob* can't make them feel better. *Katrina* can't make them feel better. Their doctors can't make them feel better.
Worker #2: No, that's what the oxycodone is for.
Law Office
Northern California
Manager of TV company: I like Val Kilmer but his rep can kiss both sides of my ass.
Burbank, California
Salesgirl #1: Can you believe that shooting at the Montage Resort in Laguna Beach?
Salesgirl #2: Yeah, it's the front page of the LA Times.
Salesgirl #3: I could really use a weekend getaway…I wonder if they are doing a shooting death discount.
Venice, California
Lesbian #1: You should get a Subaru. Come on…join the club.
Lesbian #2: I don't really want a Subaru.
Angry straight coworker: Don't get a Subaru. Dude, you people take everything! First you take the rainbow. Now Subarus! What the fuck?
Richmond, California
Overheard by: B $
Copy editor: I'm just going to knock on his door and hope he's not naked.
Anaheim, California
Overheard by: Parakeet #1
Editor #1: Look at what my mom got me! A Chanel handbag!
Editor #2: Sigh. All my parents ever get me is jewelry!
Editor #1: Yeah, but this bag is really practical. It has pockets.
San Francisco, California
Elderly attorney on phone: I knew you were Armenian. Armenians always have sweet, kind, whispered, milky voices.
Newport Beach, California
Overheard by: Slaveia
Receptionist: What are those?
Office worker (holding engraved wine glasses): These are wine glasses left over from our Christmas party in 1999, they say “Christmas 1999” on them.
Receptionist: Wow! How old are those?
Pleasanton, California
Overheard by: Mike A
Copier guy (about malfunctioning copier): I'm going to turn this copier off for a while so it can think about itself.
San Francisco, California
