Manager of apartment complex: Does your husband have a crotch rocket?
Rochester, New York
Manager of apartment complex: Does your husband have a crotch rocket?
Rochester, New York
Female office manager, coming in from the rain outside: Ugh, now I'm all wet… and not in a good way.
Watertown, Massachusetts
Manager: This chair has no balls!
Oregon
Overheard by: killerwhales
Boss: I like your pompoms.
Secretary: Thanks, I got them for my birthday.
Oregon
Overheard by: killerwhales
Creative director: This is the equivalent of a Wal-Mart cashier wearing rubber gloves. They don't like me, and I don't like them.
Augusta, Maine
Accounts manager, muttering quietly to herself about cubicle decorations: We can Amsterdam it up. Like our own flashy little brothel.
Bloomington, Minnesota
Overheard by: glasses girl
General manager: If there's a problem report immediately, don't wait for an opportune moment.
Teenage intern: Is that a real word?
General manager: What? “Opportune”?
Teenage intern: No, “moment.”
Derry, New Hampshire
Manager: So to get to know each other a little better I'm going to ask you all to answer this question: if you were an animal, what would it be? I'd be a cat, I think.
Cashier #1: A chinchilla. They're cute.
Cashier #2: A guinea pig, because they're awesome.
Cashier #3: A bird, so I could shit on anybody who tried to shit on me.
(long awkward pause)
Manager: Okay. That's a good answer too.
Selinsgrove, Pennsylvania
Manager: I've got an inch and a half I can stick in that hole.
Kansas
