Boss: Do you want to hear about what trouble my toddler got up to this morning?
Lackey: Honestly? No.
Boss: I control your paycheck.
Lackey: Nnnnnothing would make me happier.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: That was smooth.
Boss: Do you want to hear about what trouble my toddler got up to this morning?
Lackey: Honestly? No.
Boss: I control your paycheck.
Lackey: Nnnnnothing would make me happier.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: That was smooth.
Boss to underling: You owe me for taking that call.
Underling: No problem, I'll buy you lunch tomorrow.
Boss: I'll just take a tea bag.
Lenexa, Kansas
Overheard by: Alicia
Peon: I will lay pipe to get clients.
Boss: We will lose business if you do that. They'll be like “woah, they're inadequate. We're not working with those clowns again.”
International Place
Boston, Massachusetts
Boss to peon: I tried googling “hamster mating rituals”.
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Boss describing an assistant who scheduled all the engineers in team: Kim has worked horizontally through the team.
Uxbridge
England
Overheard by: I'll get fired for this
Newspaper worker: Well, we're just the minions of this company, anyway.
Newspaper manager: What's a minion?
Ft lauderdale, Florida
Boss to group of serious underlings: $10 for each business card or carnal knowledge of our target group.
Masters Tournament
Augusta, Georgia
Overheard by: glad i've got business cards
Boss to employee: Can you just wipe your forehead on my ass?
Columbus, Ohio
Department manager to two employees in their 9th month of pregnancies: I simply cannot allow you two to take maternity leave at the same time.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Lynn
Employee: So, how was your night?
Boss: I played catcher last night, so now my butt's killing me!
Employee: Um, you're talking about the softball game, right?
Denver, Colorado
