President: Hello! What are you doing today?
Director, eating canister of Planter's Peanuts: I'm eating my nuts!
Atlanta, Georgia
President: Hello! What are you doing today?
Director, eating canister of Planter's Peanuts: I'm eating my nuts!
Atlanta, Georgia
Coworker, smelling her armpit: My armpit smells great today. (pauses, smells the other armpit) Almost as good as this one.
Fort Myers, Florida
Overheard by: Greg Dunn
Cubicle drone to neighbor: They don't want to be dicks. It's like they want us to be their surrogate dicks.
Redmond, Washington
Male buyer: Did you take care of Tina's Johnson?
Female buyer: (blank stare)
Male buyer: Well, that didn't sound right now, did it?
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Cupcake
Male coworker #1 to male coworker #2: Hands up! No nipple action!
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Jefferson
Sales rep: No, she's back with her boyfriend, who's just a dick. Actually, not even interesting enough to be a dick. I mean, he works at Foot Locker.
West Bridgewater, Massachusetts
Female coworker: I had to go to the chiropractor because I got sandwiched between two fat chicks.
York, Nebraska
Overheard by: Eric J Eckert
Girl on cell in hallway: I tend to go wherever my nipples lead me.
Alpharetta, Georgia
Female coworker: I used to spray tan, but they make you orange and then you smell like Chinese food.
Male coworker: Good Chinese food or bad Chinese food?
Female coworker: Not the good kind. And then it gets all dark in the creases, and you get jaundiced knees…
Male coworker: Just what every man wants…the munchies and a sickly white woman.
Female coworker: I wanted to look Italian.
Male coworker: But instead you wound up with jaundice, smelling like Chinese food.
Plaza VII
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Hungry now
CSR: Oh my god. I just spilled soup on my glasses! I was eating soup and it splashed on my face.
1005 17th Street
Denver, Colorado
