Woman: What the hell? People disappear like it’s the damn Matrix.
32 Old Slip
New York, NY
Overheard by: Kevz
Large effeminate guy with German accent: These are the metallic pencils you do not have! (waves crayola box at employee)
Employee: Okay… Sir?
German guy: Do you know vat I am making? A portrait of Al Pacino! To really capture his manliness! Once I did a picture in charcoal but my art teacher said to really get the effect, I vould haf to burn it!
Joann's Fabrics
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: manybellsdown
Director, miming painting a wall: This is painting. It's kind of like bitch-slapping.
Adult Film Company
New York
Overheard by: fetishgirl
Manager #1: Do you think Christmas carols are appropriate for when the
prospective client comes in at 2?
Manager #2: What’s wrong with Christmas carols?
Manager #1: I just feel like it doesn’t represent us.
Manager #2: You’re asking the wrong person, because I love christmas carols.
Underling: Well, [the CEO] is the one who put this playlist on.
Manager #1 & #2: Oh, okay.
552 Broadway
New York, NY
Employee on phone: Church choir practice kicked my ass last night!
1400 Douglas Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Overheard by: DB
Temp: So the seal was playing a wind instrument?
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Courtyard dweller #1: I am not sure I should hire him.
Courtyard dweller #2: Why? He seems cool enough.
Courtyard dweller #1: I asked him what he was listening to on his iPod when he walked in.
Courtyard dweller #2: Yeah, and?
Courtyard dweller #1: He was listening to Celine Dion.
Courtyard dweller #2: Enough said.
10050 Wolfe Road
Cupertino, California
Coworker #1: What radio station do you listen to on your way to work?
Coworker #2: I listen to a Christian station so I can prepare myself for dealing with you assholes.
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: one of the assholes
Woman #1: I don’t think I can handle a two-hour meeting.
Woman #2: The trick is to doodle in your notebook the whole time; it looks like you’re taking notes.
Woman #1: I can design outfits for my cat rodeo!
330 South 3rd Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Cora
Real Estate Agent: So she totally knows this guy that’s on The Real OC; he’s a loan guy that she used to work with.
Loan Rep: What character does he play?
Real Estate Agent: He’s a loan rep.
Loan Rep: I know, but what character does he play?
22342 Avenida Empresa
Rancho Santa Margarita, California
