Employee #1: I have an emergency at two PM.
Employee #2: That’s a very scheduled emergency.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Employee #1: I have an emergency at two PM.
Employee #2: That’s a very scheduled emergency.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Office girl in stall: Fuck this! Fuck you, uterus! I’ll kick your ass!
16th Street
Tempe, Arizona
Accountant: I don’t know which color is green, but one color is green, and one color is white.
Office girl: What about red?
Accountant: I’m not so sure.
1440 South Clearview Avenue
Mesa, Arizona
Worker #1: I don’t want to donate my organs when I die. Those doctors make too much profit off the surgeries.
Worker #2: Does your wife know this? Because I’m pretty sure your next-of-kin can override your decision.
Worker #1: Is that true? I would beat my wife in heaven if she donated my organs after I was dead.
111 South 34th Street
Phoenix, Arizona
Female peon: I love eating a rare steak and then sopping up all the juice with some bread.
Male peon: You know what I like? To puncture a hole in a small animal that runs by my house and catch the blood like a fountain.
Female peon: Um, yeah, that would work, too.
4653 Cotton Gin Loop
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: RebeccaB
CSR: How do I transfer calls?
Teller: You’re an idiot wrapped in moron.
845 North Gilbert Road
Gilbert, Arizona
Engineer #1 to #2: What the hell is up with your hair?
Engineer #2: Nothing, leave me alone!
Boss to engineer #2: Don't you shower? You look like a bush hog.
Engineer #1: Yeah, you look like a bush hog.
Engineer #2: Of course I showered. I washed my hair last night. Leave me alone. What the hell is a “bush hog”?
Engineer #3: A homosexual hedgehog.
Engineer #2: Does my hair really look that bad?
Coolidge, Arizona
Suit #1: What was that?
Suit #2: What?
Suit #1: You just hid something when I came up.
Suit #2: It was my juice box, because it’s… You know…
Suit #1: What? There’s nothing wrong with drinking juice from a box. I love juice boxes.
Assistant, walking up: What are you guys talking about?
Both suits, in unison: Nothing.
Scottsdale, Arizona
Overheard by: Cube Guru
Gym employee: In addition to today's mail, I also have a small package.
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: captain subtext
