Coworker #1: How was The Simpsons Movie?
Coworker #2: Pretty good.
Coworker #1: It’s not the cartoon version, is it?
Coworker #2: Uhh… Yeah.
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Coworker #1: How was The Simpsons Movie?
Coworker #2: Pretty good.
Coworker #1: It’s not the cartoon version, is it?
Coworker #2: Uhh… Yeah.
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Office mate #1 (asking for money for lunch): Are you trying to break me already?
Office mate #2: I would love to break you.
Washington, DC
Woman on phone with tech support: Yes, ma'am, I am in front of my computer. That's how I know it's frozen.
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Office girl #1: You smell nice. What are you wearing?
Office girl #2: Deodorant.
Washington, DC
Patent attorney: The US is like the popular kid in high school. Nobody likes ’em, but you have to appease ’em.
1425 K Street, NW
Washington, DC
Woman on phone: I’m sorry I don’t think I copy. Did you say that you copied me on that copy?
1500 Eckington Pl NE
Washington, DC
Co-worker #1: Hey, are your balls getting hot?
Co-worker #2: Quite.
Co-worker #1: I hear a hot laptop kills your sperm.
Co-worker #2: I’m all for it. I smoke the seeds, too.
1759 T Street NW
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Brendan B
Customer: … And it’s Miss Jameson*, not ‘missus.’ Why does everyone always assume you’re married to some asshole?
801 Pennsylvania Avenue
Washington, DC
Humanitarian #1: If only the Superdome were in better shape.
Humanitarian #2: I’ve been in the Superdome and the Astrodome.
Humanitarian #1: The Astrodome? Is that the Astros?
Humanitarian #2: No.
Humanitarian #1: What’s the Astrodome?
Humanitarian #2: It’s where the Astros played.
Humanitarian #1: Where do they play now?
1001 G Street NW
Washington, DC
Director: Here’s the travel laptop I’m returning. Can you delete some of the files I put on there?
IT Manager: Yeah, sure, I’ll clean it out. I better not find any pubic hairs stuck in the keyboard.
1100 L Street NW
Washington, DC
