Server #1 : So…yeah, I'm going on a cruise to Hawaii.
Server #2: Oh, wow, where are you leaving from?
Server #1: Florida.
Server #2: That's a really long cruise.
Server #1: No, it's not! They're practically right next to each other!
Twinsburg, Ohio
Server #1 : So…yeah, I'm going on a cruise to Hawaii.
Server #2: Oh, wow, where are you leaving from?
Server #1: Florida.
Server #2: That's a really long cruise.
Server #1: No, it's not! They're practically right next to each other!
Twinsburg, Ohio
Loud chick: Why bother callin' it a vacation day when you can just call in sick?
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Harriet Vane
Boss: You want a raise? You come back after three weeks of vacation and spend more time in the bathroom than you do working. Maybe I should install a timeclock in there.
107 Chesley Drive
Media, Pennsylvania
Male coworker: My lips are still recovering from Vegas.
San Diego, California
Coworker #1: Don* sent me flowers today.
Coworker #2: Why did Don send you flowers? Did your grandma die again?
16th and K Street NW
Washington, DC
Boss: Could you tell me what your holiday vacation is going to be?
Employee: I will be taking 2 weeks off as I am having a problem with my vagina.
5 minutes later: a group email asking everyone to please email their schedule.
1755 Riverside Drive
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Boss: You can’t send this email out.
Peon: Why not?
Boss: It doesn’t make any sense. What’s this word here?
Peon: Hiatus.
Boss: That’s not even a word.
Peon: It means to take an extended break from work.
Boss: Look, if I don’t understand that, how do you expect anyone else to?
111 Pine Street
San Francisco, California
Director: How was your vacation?
African American employee: It was good.
Director: You're so dark you can lay in the sun for two minutes, then hang at the Tiki bar all day.
Park Ridge, New Jersey
Overheard by: Lucy
Attorney, discussing potential vacation destinations: So, I was thinking Finland.
Paralegal: That's great. You know, one of my cousins spent a month in Iceland.
Attorney, exasperated: Iceland is way different from Finland: One's like an island, the other is like an isthmus.
Fort Wayne, Indiana
Overheard by: Betsy
Coworker #1: Bill died this weekend.
Coworker #2: Really? I thought he was on vacation!
Trenton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Really?
