Peon: I was normally born, and I have a normal head!
11149 Research Boulevard
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: across the cube
Peon: I was normally born, and I have a normal head!
11149 Research Boulevard
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: across the cube
Broker on phone: Why should you buy my bond? Because you buying it is good for my firm, good for me, and two out of three ain’t bad.
1100 Louisiana Street
Houston, Texas
Boss: Oh hey, what are ya'll doing in the server closet?
Underling #1: He's playing with his new toy.
Boss: Cool. What's his new toy?
Underling #2, from behind server rack: Water gun.
Dallas, Texas
Admin: I am going to heaven!
Boss: What makes you think that?
Admin: I wrote my brother a letter.
Boss: How long has he been in jail?
Admin: Two years, and I have not spoken to him since my friend got killed.
Boss: Sooo, you think because you wrote him a letter you are going to heaven? Do you forgive him?
Admin: Hell no! If I see him, I will kill him. But I wrote him a letter!
Dallas, Texas
Software developer on phone: Like I care what it looks like during a recession? Yes… Pull all the leather out of the Porsche. They use cheap leather at the factory!
Houston, Texas
CSR: I just got a call from a guy that was looking for a customer service number for the phone company but he didn’t want an automated number, so I told him that most customer service numbers are automated. He told me, “I am a therapist; I know how the phone system works.”
6010 Exchange Parkway
San Antonio, Texas
Girl: Yeah, I’m trying to apply for chemical engineering, but when I go to fill out the online application, it says that it’s closed, but then it says that the deadline isn’t until March 1st!
Student worker: It’s April…
Clueless co-ed: But..oh…wait…January…February…March…Oh! Oh, so, like, March is before April?
1 University Station
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: m.kyti
Head of Security: I know several of you have told me I looked familiar. Well, I used to be an undercover narcotics agent…don’t worry, I won’t name names.
550 Bowie Street
Austin, Texas
Boss: Hey, you guys! We’re supposed to be a team. I think we should take a vote on the grimy chicken.
550 Bowie Street
Austin, Texas
Boss: So how are you doing? Is everything all squared away?
Peon: If by “squared away”, you mean multiple projects strewn across my desk in varying degrees of completion, then yes.
Boss: OK, good. Let me know if you need anything.
600 Congress Avenue
Austin, Texas
