Male coworker #1: I got this cheap lavender candle at Walmart and it doesn't even work! I can barely smell anything! I need some aromatherapy.
Male coworker #2: I'm telling you, you gotta buy a Yankee candle. They're the best.
Male coworker #1: Do they have lavender?
Male coworker #2: Yeah, they have lemon-lavender, vanilla-lavender…
Male coworker #1: I want just regular lavender. I'll check their website…
Washington, DC
Female sales rep #1: It's just a huge banana. I can't stand them, they're too big.
Female sales rep #2: (laughs a little)
Female sales rep #1, annoyed: I said “bananas,” stop laughing! It's just that I'm used to smaller ones, those were just too big.
Female sales rep #2: (laughs harder)
Delran, New Jersey
Overheard by: Bruce Banner
Boss: I'm allergic to nuts.
Secretary: I can hold nuts but I just can't put them in my mouth.
Markham
Ontario
Canadia
Boss lady: Who are we missing? Mario*?
(Mario* comes into conference room)
Manager: Aha! I thought I smelled ravioli!
Boss lady: Ignore him, he's drunk.
Manager: Yep, it's after noon!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Female manager to male manager annoying her: So how does your coffee and Visine taste this morning?
Bakersfield, California
Consultant: I just pulled it out. I'm coming.
Louisiana State University
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Cube rat to another, discussing lunch: I don't like the taste, so I just hurried up and swallowed it.
Voice over cubicle wall: That's what she said!
Anchorage, Alaska
Overheard by: Laughing in Alaska
Coworker to another: I was going to get you back by putting your phone in the fridge. However, I opened that fridge… and it was like death in there.
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Copywriter #1: Hey, Margaret Atwood's coming out with her own brand of coffee.
Copywriter #2: That'll be the weirdest coffee ever!
Copywriter #3: It'll taste like… Birds!
Ontario
Canadia
Office girl: I think any merry-go-round involving drilldoes is not a merry-go-round I want to partake in.
Brookline, Massachusetts
