Geeky IT guy: How can you hate fonts?
Memphis, Tennessee
Overheard by: indifferent to fonts
Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category
11AM Sign Off on Blueprints
Director: Hey, you got a tape measure?
Ops Coordinator: What do you need a tape measure for?
3 Nationwide Plaza
Columbus, Ohio
We Think This Quote Is Kind Of Awesome
Secular Muslim salesgirl #1: What do you think of what I am wearing?
Secular Muslim salesgirl #2: I’m glad you asked, it’s bizarre. Why are you wearing such a short skirt? It’s winter! And is that shirt actually lingerie? And why are you wearing a veil? Especially with all this? I’ve never seen you wear a veil!
Secular Muslim salesgirl #1: My grandmother put glue in my shampoo bottle to try to force me to cover my hair and dress more conservatively. I didn’t have time to fix it. I had to wear a veil. And the rest… well, I couldn’t let her win.
Clothing Store
Sarajevo
Bosnia and Herzegovina
1PM Lunch
Suit #1: So how have you been lately?
Suit #2: Eh, you know, overworked.
Suit #1: Yeah, same here…By the way, nice tan you’ve got there.
Suit #2: Thanks, you too.
590 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
They Smell Like Victory!
Asian coworker, looking up abruptly: You know that smell that you get in your nose when you’re done smelling something? I smell meatballs.
St. Cloud, Minnesota
Is Body Size the Last Acceptable Prejudice? Discuss.
Coworker: Dude, what’s the best Chinese place for lunch?
Overweight secretary: Ruby Foo’s, just below us!
Coworker: Thanks! (aside) See, the whale’s good for something.
Manhattan, New York
…At Length, If Necessary
Manager: So Mike* is leaving.
Office peon #1: Will anyone notice? What does he do, anyway?
Office peon #2: He’s a fluffer.
Office peon #1: What?!
Office peon #2: What? He, y’know, fluffs out his job so it looks like he’s doing more than he is.
Manager to office peon #1: After the meeting, you explain.
Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: EarleyDaysYet
11AM Meeting with NJ Branch Folks
Co-worker on phone: When you get out of the subway station start walking North–
Manager: Don’t tell them that…your North is different from my North and it’s a tarantula downpour outside. You don’t want them walking the wrong way in the rain.
Co-worker: Everyone’s North is the same and it’s torrential downpour.
Manager: Everyone’s North is the same? I always get my Norths mixed up.
535 8th Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Angie Rowe
2PM Schedule Beginner MSOffice Classes
Purchasing: Hey, can we print from Word?
Marketing: Ah…What?
2801 Red Lion Road
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
If There Are Complications, You Get a Set of Steak Knives
Patient: Do you offer any discounts if this is my second surgery?
Receptionist: Sure, we can throw in a free appendectomy or colonoscopy… Your choice.
Orange Avenue
Orlando, Florida
