Lady peon: Beautiful day, isn’t it?
Male peon: Sure is — some fine weather here.
Lady peon: I hope it lasts, but I don’t know about this weekend — I’ve heard it might get cool.
Male peon: Yeah, that must be hard for women.
Lady peon: What?
Male peon: Yeah, it must hard trying to figure out what to wear — shorts, skorts, capris, pants, skirts. Guys don’t have that problem.
Lady peon: Okay. You have a good day.
Geneseo, New York
Peon #1: Yeah, I got the printer from this place that sells refurbished computers. Homeless people do it.
Peon #2: Ahhh, homeless people. What can’t they do?
12 Desbrosses Street
New York, New York
Overheard by: Grace
Quiet female coworker: I hope my placenta's huge!
Downtown Albany, New York
Overheard by: Oddly enough, I don't
Manager: Man, I hate that rep. Only he has the power to permeate every fiber of my being with his earnest, sniveling, annoying little voice. “I’m sorry.” “Would you mind?” “Is it a problem?” Grow some balls, freak show!
105 Avenue O
Brooklyn, New York
Woman carrying takeout lunch: This bag is fully biodegradable and compostable… like my career!
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Exec assistant on phone: They’re gay boys, so… you know… maybe a little more stainless steel…
47th Street and Park Avenue
New York, New York
Canadian arborist: Check it out. I can streamline the camera in the town square back at home in Brandon. I called my dad and told him to drive by and wave. Sometimes, if you watch long enough, you can see someone crash.
Westchester, New York
Cabbie yelling out window to guy who cut him off: Your mother is a puta! Your mother is a puta! Your mother is a puta! Your mother is a puta! [Gets out at red light, walks to offender’s car, points his butt at and simulates farting on the car, then gets back into cab and yells out window again.] You have no pee-pee! You have no pee-pee! You have no pee-pee! You have no pee-pee!
Outside White Plains train station
New York
Overheard by: ccampoll
Chick to coworker: Ohhh, okay. Maybe she should stop getting f-ed in the nose. It’s only gonna make her uglier.
Upper West Side
New York, New York
Administrator (filling water bottle at cooler): Hey.
Office worker (walking by): Hey.
Administrator: How are you?
Office worker: Good.
Administrator: How is the baby?
Office worker: Fat.
Hanover Square
New York City, New York
Overheard by: Mr. Uncreative
