New York

Cube #1: You know what? I wish I was drinking like…some King Cobra right now.
Cube #2: Oh, I know.
Cube #1: Or like a log of chocolate.
Cube #2: Yeah. Chocolate. In the shape of an actual log.
Cube #1: Yeah.

350 Madison Avenue
New York, NY

User: My computer won’t turn on.
Tech: The tower is missing. How do you expect to use a computer someone stole?
User: Well, they left the keyboard, mouse and monitor. Is that something?

498 7th Avenue
New York, NY

Manager: Have a good weekend.
Underling: You’re leaving?
Manager: You’re not.

452 Fifth Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Bob

Intern #1: So are you lactose intolerant?
Intern #2: No, I’m not lactose intolerant, it just makes my throat close up.

304 Hudson Street
New York, NY

Consultant #1: Where is [Jeff]?
Consultant #2: He’s not in my cubicle. That leaves the rest of the universe for you to search.
Consultant #1: Is he at lunch?
Consultant #2: If you’re going to start looking, do it now. The universe closes at 5.

250 Broadway
New York, NY

VP:I swear to God, the assistant at [DouglasCo] is so stupid.
Admin: Hey, even stupid people need jobs.
Coworker: Yeah. Some of them even make it to VP.

388 Greenwich Street
New York, NY

Co-worker #1: Hey, we get off for February 20th, too.
Co-worker #2: Oh, for President’s Day? Wait, when is Independence Day? That’s in the summer, right?
Co-worker #1: Uh, yeah, that’s July 4th.

175 5th Avenue
New York, NY

Overheard by: Peter H

Architect #1: She’s an artist.
Architect #2: No, she’s crazy.

515 Canal Street
New York, NY

Overheard by: Emma B

Associate: I have a idea that might be helpful.
Manager: You know what a suggestion is? It’s an OFI: Opportunity For Improvement.

327 West 14th Street
New York, NY

Overheard by: Fidget

Supervisor: Boy, that was one killer party! I’ve never kissed so many butts at once in my life!

640 5th Avenue
New York, NY