Kansas

Boss to underling: You owe me for taking that call.
Underling: No problem, I'll buy you lunch tomorrow.
Boss: I'll just take a tea bag.

Lenexa, Kansas

Overheard by: Alicia

Cube dweller: I used the butt technique.

Atchison, Kansas

Sales guy #1: He could be a tranny.
Sales guy #2: Dave*, you are a retard.
Sales guy #1: You don't know! He could be a tranny!

Bonner Springs, Kansas

Redneck salesman #1: Don't you have a customer coming into the showroom?
Redneck salesman #2: I sure do, but if she's there when I walk in I'm gonna walk right by because I have got to take a shit.

Wichita, Kansas

Overheard by: crittle monkey

IT guy with thick Middle Eastern accent: No Phil*, they are Canadian, they don’t know what they are talking about anyway.

Sprint Headquarters
Overland Park, Kansas

Customer: What are all of those light switches for?
Store clerk, without looking up: For turning things on and off.

Wichita, Kansas

Overheard by: Chandra

Boss: You don’t need lubricants. That’s what diarrhea is for!

Kansas

Boss: Look, I don’t care if you use the loft, but if you get butt-ass freaky, just change the sheets.

Bonner Springs, Kansas

Boss: Man, there were some fine cougars in there! I mean, this one woman — she had gray hair, but she was, like, hot! I mean, like Falcon Crest-hot!

Bonner Springs, Kansas