Junior Help Desk Agent: Nothing makes her happy. All she does is complain. I would hate to be her husband.
Senior Help Desk Agent: Uh, Joe, that is the speakerphone button, not the on-hold button.
User on speaker: Do you think you can stop ranting and help “the bitch” now?
8001 Development Drive
Research Triangle Park, North Carolina
Overheard by: EL Gee
Manager: You brought in cake and didn’t include me in the e-mail?
Co-worker: Oh, I’m sorry, I thought I got everyone.
Manager: Bitch.
260 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: briarose
Boss: Where the fuck is my breakfast? Why hasn’t it been delivered yet? I’m not even hungry anymore, I could have raised my own fucking chicken for the eggs and planted my own fucking orange tree by now.
Worker: You didn’t order anything with eggs.
135 West 36th Street
New York, NY
Clerk: I’m startin’ the day with two “ah, shits” and not an “atta boy” in sight.
1400 Douglas Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Clerk #1: Hey [David], what are you up to?
Clerk #2: Working. You should try it sometime.
1400 Douglas Street
Omaha, Nebraska
Manager: Have a good weekend.
Underling: You’re leaving?
Manager: You’re not.
452 Fifth Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Bob
Receptionist: What did you think of that visiting speaker? He was kinda cute!
Engineer: What a dork!
Receptionist: So he was a dork by dork standards? Wow!
ASU Engineering Center
Tempe, Arizona
Manager: If it didn’t mean I would have to interview new people I would lobby to have half the staff here fired
2345 Crystal Drive
Arlington, Virginia
Co-worker #1: Didn’t you wear that shirt two days ago?
Co-worker #2: Huh? What? I don’t know…
Co-worker #1: Yeah, I remember you had that sweater on a couple of days back.
Co-worker #2: Did you look that up on www.victoriaknowswhateveryonewears.com? Oh wait, it kicks back to another site, www.gofuckyourselfvictoria.com.
460 West 34th Street
New York, NY
CSR: That guy was such a moron! And he kept trying to tell me he had a
photographic memory. I thought to myself, “Yeah, well you must be out of film.”
7350 Tilghman Street
Allentown, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: jara
