Indiana

2PM Get Receipts to Billing

Boss: Did you find that receipt?
Underling: No, it’s not in the receipt file. I checked every receipt for the last six months. It’s not there.
Boss: Why don’t you look again?
Underling: I knew you’d ask, so I looked twice already. It’s not there. Is there somewhere else that you put receipts?
Boss: No, only the receipt file. But if it’s not in there, it’s not a big deal. Later today, if you have time, why don’t you look again in the file?
Underling: Okay, but if it’s not there now, it won’t be there later.
Boss: Yeah okay, but why don’t you just look again?

1028 East Private Road 1200 North
Farmersburg, Indiana

Good Point — You Play It As It Lays

Man describing adoption of Chinese kid: .. And eventually you get a baby’s photo and a medical history…
Hick female photographer: But let me ask you, what do you do if she’s ugly?
Man: … What did your parents do?

Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Shatmandu

12PM Troubleshooting Meeting

Consultant: That is correct, we’ve found that problem in the past to be…well…problematic.

111 East 71st Street
Indianapolis, Indiana

Fortunately, His Wife Got Custody of His Lungs

Smoker #1: Hey, I didn’t know you smoked. When did you start smoking?
Smoker #2: About four years ago, right after my wife left me. It gives me something else to do with my hands.

Kokomo, Indiana

You Laugh, But Do You Know?

Rep 1: The salon across the way, their back door is wide open, but they’ve been closed for hours. What should we do?
Rep 2: Call the police. The non-emergency number, I’d say.
Rep 1: Okay… er, what’s the non-emergency number for 911?

Scatterfield Road
Anderson, Indiana

Overheard by: Oh, the pain…

Indiana's Only Gay Man Is Often Misunderstood

Flamboyant male coworker to female coworker: Can I borrow your cream?
Female co-worker: (stunned silence)
Flamboyant male coworker: Er! Cream-er!

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: liz

Damnit– It Was a Carriage Seat Five Minutes Ago

Security guard in lobby: Ma'am, you need to take the baby out of the pumpkin seat before you put the pumpkin seat through the x-ray machine.

Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Girl Friday

People in Middle-America Generally Try to Remain Ignorant of What’s Happening in San Francisco

CSR #1: Don’t make fun of me, but where is San Francisco?
CSR #2, laughing: What? Are you serious? We have an office there!
CSR #1: I said don’t make fun of me!
CSR #2: California, Lisa*. It’s in California.

Fishers, Indiana

Overheard by: Geography is not her best subject

But Unfortunately, I Can’t Cross the Street on My Own Yet

Bus boy #1: I went to the new hostess’s MySpace page.
Bus boy #2: The little mousey girl?
Bus boy #1: Turns out she’s bi. Got a picture on there of her getting nailed from behind by another chick with a strap-on.
Bus boy #2: God, if my mom would let me, I would marry her!

Circle Centre Mall
Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Shatmandu

In Fact, That’s Our Firm’s Three-Prong Test for Fun

Attorney to another: You are always a lot of fun when your dress ends up around your waist. Or your head. Or your feet.

1 Indiana Square
Indianapolis, Indiana

Overheard by: Amanda

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