Female designer #1: Did she have natural birth or were they cut out?
Female designer #2: They say that after you have the first, the rest just slide out.
Soho
New York City, New York
Female designer #1: Did she have natural birth or were they cut out?
Female designer #2: They say that after you have the first, the rest just slide out.
Soho
New York City, New York
Pregnant employee at coworker's baby shower: Oh, an anti-roll pillow! Thank you!
Male employee: What's it for?
Pregnant employee: To keep the baby from rolling onto his stomach and possibly suffocating in the crib.
Chatty woman: My two babies died from sleeping on their stomachs.
(stunned silence)
Chatty woman: Just kidding! (laughs)
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: office monkey extraordinaire
Coworker #1: What are you talking about?
Coworker #2: I'm telling them how my parents almost aborted me.
Coworker #3, walking in: What are you guys talking about?
Coworker #2: It's a survival story!
Branchburg, New Jersey
Female coworker: So how's your wife?
Male coworker: Not good, actually.
Female coworker: Why, what's up?
Male coworker: Well, she's having pains…in her… Ummmm…baby area. Ummm…you know.
Brooklyn Center, Minnesota
Overheard by: adelhiede
Office cleaning lady: Does anyone know how to clean mice balls?
Arlington, Virginia
Man #1: So how was your long weekend?
Man #2: It was good. How was yours?
Man #1: Not as good as yours. She is not pregnant.
Atlanta, Georgia
Benefit lady: Would you like to buy a raffle ticket?
Pompous cube dweller: I've already bought a muffin for three times as much as I normally would. That's all the boobs get from me today.
Breast Cancer Awareness Bake Sale & Silent Auction
Maitland, Florida
Overheard by: crisa
Cubicle dweller #1: How much is a Brazilian anyway?
Cubicle dweller #2: I think it depends on the size.
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Eli
Peon #1, seeing ambulance and EMTs in warehouse: What's going on?
Peon #2: Michael's* having a heart attack.
Peon #1: Let's go smoke a cigarette, no one will notice!
Laporte, Indiana
Overheard by: and yes, he lost his job
Lady coworker to male coworker: Did you order the cleaning clit?
Elyria, Ohio
Overheard by: sarah
