Head of HR: I bet you he’s [the COO] a total virgin. Probably even a hand virgin.
402 Pacific Avenue
San Francisco, California
Head of HR: I bet you he’s [the COO] a total virgin. Probably even a hand virgin.
402 Pacific Avenue
San Francisco, California
Program Manager: Dude! You know that one tech writer, that one chick?
Engineer: Yeah, the older one? She’s a nice person.
Program Manager: Yeah, I know. Man, sometimes she gets like this massive camel-toe.
Engineer: Dude, you need whisper those kinds of things.
Program Manager: But man, you could measure it in inches! Oh shit, here she comes.
She walks by. The Program Manager follows her, turns around seconds later and gives the split finger sign.
41311 Vincenti Court
Novi, Michigan
Girl: …did you go to Overheard in the Office? It said, “Helpful Co-worker: Does anyone want anything from Starbucks? Tired Co-worker: Yeah, get me a triple iced mocha with a shot of crack in it.”
Guy: That sounds delicious, although I don’t think baking soda tastes so good.
Girl: Believe it or not, I’ve actually tried baking soda–for heartburn. Works great, tastes like ass.
Guy: Are you for real? Think of the wonders crack must do for heartburn, then.
Girl: What heartburn? You don’t eat anything while you’re on crack!
Guy: By the way, your last comment was Overheard in the Office worthy.
1201 Broadway
New York, NY
Senior Manager: They’re paying him $70,000 a year. What is he going to do? Live in a shack in the Bronx?
1345 Avenue of the Americas
New York, NY
Guy: I’m guessing she’s not digging her job too much.
Girl: No, she digs it fine. She was promoted to SA and she talks to her friends on the phone all day without anyone calling her on it. She better be digging her job a lot ’cause she gets away with all kinds of shit.
3350 Riverwood Parkway
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: n-ro
Guy #1: I can’t believe he did that in public; did you see the way he was looking at her?
Guy #2: Yeah, and it wasn’t the first time either.
Guy #1: She can’t be any older than 15.
Guy #2: It’s sick, but you know what really creeps me out? He’s always wearing wrinkly shirts. You’d think the man has never heard of an iron…
Guy #1: You can do anything you want with that MD after your name, I guess.
Guy #2: Word.
275 Madison Avenue
New York, NY
Overheard by: Justin Laman
Co-worker: Avoid the bathroom in about an hour, you-know-who just sat down to eat some pea soup.
1 International Plaza
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: courtesy flush
Co-worker #1: Whenever you pass by there’s never anyone in there.
Co-worker #2: It’s probably a Front.
Co-worker #1: It is a front; there’s a fight club going on in the back room.
Co-worker #3: I know a guy that works at one of those.
Co-worker #1: He works at a fight club?
685 Cathcart Street
Montreal, Quebec
Canadia
Overheard by: Timmy O’ Toole
Co-worker: That new guy is really dumb.
Speakerphone: Well it is fun watching him.
Co-worker: It’s like watching a cat shoveling shit with two broken paws.
8400 36th Street
Miami, Florida
Lady #1: You know, I think we just need to go over there and just bomb the shit out of them.
Lady #2: Without warning?
Lady #1: Fuck that shit. No warning, just bomb it to pieces.
Lady #2: You know, I used to think we should protect the women and children, but they’re just as bad! They do all the dirty work for them.
Lady #1: I agree with you 100%. All the kids have guns there, anyway.
Lady #2: Totally. They all have guns.
80 South 8th Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
