Lady: I don’t like catfish. Catfish scare me ’cause I’m afraid they can walk.
Coworker: Do you eat the eyes?
414 East 12th Street
Kansas City, Missouri
Lady: I don’t like catfish. Catfish scare me ’cause I’m afraid they can walk.
Coworker: Do you eat the eyes?
414 East 12th Street
Kansas City, Missouri
Woman, about bald Britney: She looks like a little child from Auschwitz!
Man: If only.
1040 Avenue of the Americas
New York, New York
Overheard by: Limey
Guy #1: Is this a picture of your daughter?
Guy #2: Yeah. She’s really starting to fill out.
1501 E. Woodfield Road
Schaumburg, Illinois
Customer: So, yeah, the wedding’s off. I just couldn’t deal with her mother, you know?
Salesgirl: Totally.
Customer: She was just always sticking her nose into our business — we couldn’t get a moment of peace.
Salesgirl: Yeah.
Customer: And then, of course, [my wife] goes and tells her about my impotence, and it all went downhill from there.
Salesgirl: God. Well, you did the right thing. Just hang in there.
Customer: Mmm. Anyway, it was really nice meeting you, Julie*.
Melbourne
Australia
Overheard by: Kate
Sales assistant on phone: What? I thought you were a boy. Well, as long as they don’t match.
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Overheard by: what?
Gay customer: Excuse me, [points to employee] is that man gay?
Clerk: I’m not sure
Gay customer: He comes off as gay.
Clerk: I guess…
Gay customer, turning to boyfriend: I wouldnt bang him, would you?
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Female coworker: … And you know what she did? She went to hug me, and when she did they shot her.
1250 Broadway
New York, New York
Lab guy on cell: What did you just say to me? Oh, goat porn! Yeah, I like goat porn, too.
Science center
Long Island, New York
Employee #1, reading newspaper: This guy’s name is Poon Tang! I can’t believe they printed his name!
Employee #2: Isn’t Poon Tang something they said on The Little Rascals?
Knoxville, Tennessee
