Pale girl: Look at these freckles on the back of my hand. Oh, my — what is this dark ring?!
Smoker: That’s called a tan.
130 East Randolph Street
Chicago, Illinois
Pale girl: Look at these freckles on the back of my hand. Oh, my — what is this dark ring?!
Smoker: That’s called a tan.
130 East Randolph Street
Chicago, Illinois
Coworker #1: How was The Simpsons Movie?
Coworker #2: Pretty good.
Coworker #1: It’s not the cartoon version, is it?
Coworker #2: Uhh… Yeah.
Navy Yard
Washington, DC
Boss on phone: Hey, uh, I booked a vacation with you guys and pre-paid and everything, and uh, well, (pause) I don't really know how to say this, but uh, I did some things… You know, uh-uh-uh, things you do when you are on vacation, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh… and… uh, well I overslept and missed my flight back home, so I had to buy another airline ticket and want to know if I can get some of my money back.
Richmond, Virginia
Secretary: You know, those wireless headsets have been a boon for the homeless.
Fort Worth, Texas
Overheard by: mmhmmm
Folks in our little cube farm were shutting things down to leave for the weekend, when a loud voice rose from one of the cubes: Just once I wish Microsoft Outlook would wait while I shut down!
1256 Porter Avenue
Bristol, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Michael Leatherbury
Boss: I don’t need to see everything before it goes out the door. Just send me a final, final, rough draft.
Union Square
New York, New York
Finance: There must be something in between “tax accountant” and
“undercover narc.”
156 W. 56th Street
New York, NY
Proofer: Is “situs” the right word there? I'm not sure what that is.
Actuary: Yes, I don't know what that is either, but we've been using it consistently.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Grunt #1: So, this report is wrong.
Grunt #2: Yes.
Grunt #1: I see what I did wrong.
Grunt #2: Good!
Grunt #1: Do you know why I filled this out incorrectly?
Grunt #2: Uhhh…
North Side
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Diana_C
Librarian: Your card is locked because there appears to be ketchup or chocolate milk all over this book you returned. You have to pay for a replacement.
Patron: It’s vomit. I don’t do chocolate milk.
Librarian: You still have to pay.
Public library
Park Ridge, New Jersey
Overheard by: Part Time Librarian
