Co-worker #1: You smell of fish!
Co-worker #2: I’ve been at a fishmongers!
Co-worker #1: Oh! I thought it was an urban myth but they actually do sell fish at a fishmongers?
Co-worker #2: …What?
Commercial Road
Hull, East Yorkshire
UK
Overheard by: Simon Green
Colleague: So, there is a good reason to suggest that Al-Quieda are Gerry Anderson fans.
England
Overheard by: SpaceBee
Customer, looking at a damaged mobile home: How did that happen?
Mechanic: The guy put it on cruise control and went into the back to make a sandwich.
Repair Center
England
Overheard by: Rob
Coworker: Hey, Sarah, how's your grammar?
Sarah: My grandma? She died two years ago. Why?
Newcastle
England
Bipedal co-worker: I don't have enough legs for that!
England
Support staff #1, about cute work experience girl: Ohh, if only I were 10 years younger…
Support staff #2: She'd be ten.
Bournemouth
Dorset, England
Male employee #1, at lunch, peeling a banana: So, I'm doing a detox diet, where I eat only fruit for two weeks, and a bit of meat is introduced during the third. It's rough, but I'm actually starting to feel more sprightly.
Male employee #2: I say…it really works? I should try it. I'm knackered, and I'm getting a paunch. I'd like to detox that baby from my midriff.
(thin, lovely, female coworker, clutching mug of coffee, enters lunchroom)
Male employee #2: Sophie, what do you do to keep fit? Do you eat fruit at breakfast, perhaps?
Sophie, taking sip of coffee: I believe for breakfast I had beer and chocolate biscuits.
High Holborn
London
England
Overheard by: Mr Tickle
Film crew girl #1: So, it was really awful, then?
Film crew girl #2: Oh my god, it was worse. He gave me the worst sex ever. I mean, the least you can do when you’ve made me pay for dinner and the cinema and drinks and stayed at my house all weekend is give me a right good seeing to.
Film crew girl #1: Seeing him again?
Film crew girl #2: Tomorrow night.
Brick Lane
London
England
Overheard by: Nics
Employee #1: So as the guy was doing my nails–
Employee #2: –Wait, you have a man do your nails?
Employee #1: Oh, it’s okay, he’s Asian.
John Adam Street
London, England
Overheard by: rubywoo
Cubicle girl #1: Damn! No toilet paper!
Cubicle girl #2, hesistantly: No. None in here, either.
Cubicle girl #1: Argh, I'll just have to wiggle. (pause) I hate wiggling! (pause) Only boys should have to wiggle.
Girls' Toilets
England
Overheard by: Disturbed Toilet User
