Paralegal #1: It’s funny when I enter a label for what type of event the attorney is doing, one of them says “Meditation”. Who would meditate in the conference room?
Paralegal #2: Are you sure it doesn’t say “Mediation”?
Paralegal #1: Oh yeah, I guess that would make more sense in a law firm, huh?
7700 Old Georgetown Road
Bethesda, Maryland
Office peon: How the hell do you not know what Knight Rider is? I can't stand chicks like that. They're only good for one thing, and even that isn't that good.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: I know what Knight Rider is
Analyst reviewing error report: Working this report requires critical thinking skills.
Department head: What kind of critical thinking skills?
701 Park Avenue
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Office idiot: Dublin and Luxembourg is two different places, right?
Wall Street
New York City, New York
Female coworker: I don’t know. I was thinking about losing about 50 pounds.
Male coworker: Yeah, I think I could lose about 30 to 40 myself.
Female coworker: You know what I heard? With men, if you lose, like, 35 pounds, you gain an inch.
Male coworker: Uh…
500 North King Street
Wilmington, Delaware
Overheard by: i just wanted a coke
Sales guy to another: Hey, have you ever tried that green fairy stuff? You know, abstinence?
Atlanta, Georgia
Cube dweller #1: Those guys out there in the warehouse are nice and seem to be doing well, but I don’t know that any of them are going to go out of their way to be helpful.
Cube dweller #2: You mean ‘proactive.’
Cube dweller #1: Well, yeah…
Cube dweller #2: Jack* [warehouse guy] used that term with me once — ‘proactive.’
Cube dweller #1: Uh-oh, maybe the drama out there is his fault.
Cube dweller #2: See, I always thought it was something Jessica Simpson used on her face, but he used it in a totally different way.
Cube dweller #1: … There’s no words to answer you right now…
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
Librarian: Jeans, brain and behavior?
Student: Uh, genes with a G.
Librarian: Like this? Gene’s brain and behavior?
Student: There’s no apostrophe.
Librarian: I’m not getting any results.
Student: Well, I’m pretty sure it’s officially spelled with an ampersand.
Librarian: A what?
Addlestone Library
Charleston, South Carolina
Cube rat playing with promotional sticky ball: When I hold this ball too long my hand starts to smell.
1440 Broadway
New York, New York
Sales assistant #1: My dad came over this last weekend and wormed Annabelle for me.
Office manager: Why did your dad have to do it?
Sales assistant #2: Is this your aunt?
Office manager: Don’t you just give her a pill?
Sales assistant #1: No, you put it up her… poo.
Sales assistant #2: Ummm…
Sales assistant #3: It’s an animal, Ed*!
Sales assistant #1: My dad wormed Josie, too. He has to put the medicine up the dog’s tushy.
Sales assistant #2: Ohhh, okay, I thought this was her aunt. I’m okay now.
England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina
