Virginia

Psychiatric nurse, to rest of treatment team, about patient who almost choked: You know Mark*, he sees a big piece of meat, he just puts the whole thing in his mouth.

Catawba, Virginia

Finance clerk: Every time she comes in here, he grabs it and pulls it out, and she runs away.

Vienna, Virginia

Overheard by: Receptionitis

Coworker: They've done a complete 360 on this project.

Virginia

Overheard by: SexKitten

Teen girl: If I don’t get an A on this English test I’m going to be even screwed-er.

High school
Sterling, Virginia

Overheard by: The Mean Teacher

Staff #1: Does anyone know what that sign refers to?
Senior Associate: Which one?
Staff #1: The one that says “2121 Lunch E On”.
Staff #2: Did you just say “Lunch E On”?
Staff #1: Well, what does it say?

2345 Crystal Drive
Arlington, Virginia

Overheard by: Ten Kay

Student teacher: So, what is your school’s policy concerning sodas? Am I allowed to bring them as long as they are in an unmarked container?
Teacher: Yes, most definitely. Some of the other schools in the area have taken out their drink machines for teachers, but our principal’s a Coke addict.

4858 Lead Mine Road
Snowville, Virginia

Office girl #1 while watching the patriots vs colts game: Who are you rooting for?
Office girl #2: New England.
Office girl #1: Hey, where is New England, anyway?
Office girl #2: Ummm, it’s a region up North.
Office girl #1: Oh, I knew it was in Canada somewhere!

Woodbridge, Virginia

Overheard by: Sara

Office peon: How many wheels does an 18-wheeler have?
Boss: Let me see your résumé again.

1212 Klockner Road
Gordonsville, Virginia

Overheard by: the office linebacker

Programming #1: I totally didn’t realize he was holding a bong.
Programming #2: That explains why the smores thing was funny.

11951 Freedom Drive
Reston, Virginia

Coworker on phone: Just wear your own clothes.

Arlington, Virginia

Overheard by: DC Diva