Accountant: We’re taking Mark* to Joe’s Crab Shack for his retirement party at the end of the month.
Secretary: Is that where you want to go? I figured you for more of a Hooters man. Wouldn’t you rather have Hooters than crabs?
Mark: I thought the two went hand in hand! You can’t have one without the other.
401 Church Street
Nashville Tennessee
Teacher #1, to teacher #2: I like my vagina the way it is, I wouldn’t change a thing about it.
Aberfoyle Park High School, Taylors Road East
Aberfoyle Park, South Australia
Overheard by: Megan
Voicemail: Hello, this is Joe* from engineering, I’m having a problem with my computer, and was told you could help me out. It appears that there is a problem with my fixed dick…er, ficked disk, fisk dick.
[pause]
FIXED DISK…..
4747 Harrison Avenue
Rockford, Illinois
General manager to hostess who slipped and fell: So, how’s your ass?
Beaumont, Texas
Male legal assistant: Sean*, all we need is vaginas.
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: Confused Coworker
Worker: I felt like you were undressing me with your eyes and re-dressing me in office casual!
Carrol Avenue
Takoma Park, Maryland
Secretary: I didn’t know I could write off a hummer on my taxes!
383 Madison Street
New York, NY
Assistant to director: I think I'm going to ride your beast tonight. (pause) Wait. That came out wrong.
Indianapolis, Indiana
Technician: Hi, can I get under your desk for a second to look at your box?
1440 Broadway
New York, NY
Male boss to female employee: The best way to learn is on your knees. That way they don’t fall as far if you drop them.
Orlando, Florida
