Programmer returning from extended bathroom break: You know, I don’t want to include too much information, but my pants fit much better now.

1900 Richmond Road
Cleveland, Ohio

Overheard by: The Surly Programmer

Client on phone: May I talk to Mr. Ackerman*, please?
Receptionist: I’m sorry, but Mr. Ackerman doesn’t work here anymore. Would you like to leave a message?

Toledo, Ohio

Overheard by: jullylully

Tech #1: Can I have the key to the IDF closet?
Tech #2: I don’t have it, it’s in the lockbox.
Tech #1: Well then, can I have the key to the lockbox?
Tech #2: It’s not locked.

20800 Harvard Road
Cleveland, Ohio

Bank teller #1: So what did you do?
Bank teller #2, wearing name tag that says “Sue*”: I told him my name was Kelly and I ran!

Dayton, Ohio

Opinionated coworker: My wife’s mad at me because I think she’s an idiot.

Main Street and Grant Avenue
Columbus, Ohio

Eager presenter: We need people who can walk the talk and live the walk.

Kirtland, Ohio

Overheard by: street smart, no street genuis!

Director: Hey, you got a tape measure?
Ops Coordinator: What do you need a tape measure for?

3 Nationwide Plaza
Columbus, Ohio

Coworker: They're from Canada… Oh, no, they're not from Canada, they're from Portland. Same difference.

Columbus, Ohio

Professor #1: I'm going to go home and collapse. I'll be back online later this afternoon.
Professor #2: How was the conference?
Professor #1: Oh, it was great. It was in Canada, so all the faculty were about smoking pot and nude beaches.
Professor #2: We have a beach! We have faculty!

Cleveland, Ohio

Overheard by: blackmail

CSR on phone: Call back tomorrow and we’ll see if we can get the world to revolve around you.

175 South Third Street
Columbus, Ohio