Mother: I think Grandma Olson has a little bit of a cirrhosis thing going on.
Little girl: Why’s that?
Mother: Because Grandma Olson drinks much, much, much more than-
Little girl: -Than grandpa?
Mother: Than anyone in the world.
120 Kellogg Boulevard
St. Paul, Minnesota
IT guy: I feel for teachers, because it’s not like the good old days when you could take kids under the stairwell and pummel them.
Bush Lake Road
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: just trying to finish the day
Female coworker: I used to spray tan, but they make you orange and then you smell like Chinese food.
Male coworker: Good Chinese food or bad Chinese food?
Female coworker: Not the good kind. And then it gets all dark in the creases, and you get jaundiced knees…
Male coworker: Just what every man wants…the munchies and a sickly white woman.
Female coworker: I wanted to look Italian.
Male coworker: But instead you wound up with jaundice, smelling like Chinese food.
Plaza VII
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Hungry now
Receptionist: Does the president have to pay the mortgage on the White House?
1600 Utica Avenue South
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: wish she hadn’t voted
Manager: …because sometimes we get communications via electronic sending, sometimes through the telephone system.
650 South 6th Street
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Overheard by: Jeff Anderson
Coworker #1: I'm on this new diet.
Coworker #2: Oh yeah?
Coworker #1: Yeah, it's this diet where if you aren't hungry you don't eat.
Bloomington, Minnesota
Boss: By the way, I changed a lot of your code, so if it breaks, that’s why.
5720 Green Circle Drive
Minnetonka, Minnesota
Girl executive: I bank at Wells Fargo.
Guy executive: Oh, they charge a bunch of fees. You must like getting fucked in the ass.
Girl executive: Well…
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Secretary on phone: I guess I don't need a tapeworm after all.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Worker bee #1: Was this a fire alarm or a severe weather alert?
Worker bee #2: I don’t think they would kick us outside during a tornado.
Opperman Drive
Eagan, Minnesota
