Everybody Feels That Way about Dr. Phil

Peon: I don’t know… It just seems like kind of a waste of Jell-O.

1 Athenaeum Street
Cambridge, Massachusetts

Posted on September 22, 2014
Coworkers, Gripes, Massachusetts, Meals and Snacks

With Connie, at Least You Know Where It's Been

Female coworker #1: Is that a cucumber you just pulled out of your desk drawer?
Female coworker #2: Yeah, Connie gave it to me yesterday. So watch out: today is “beat people with a cucumber day”, so if you piss me off I'm gonna hit you with my cucumber.
Female coworker #1: Wait… Why did Connie give you a cucumber?
Female coworker #2: She had it at her desk yesterday and was having some fun with it. Then she got tired of it, so she gave it to me.

Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

Overheard by: WD40

Posted on September 22, 2014
Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, Pennsylvania, Questions, Sexuality, Threats

3PM Bathroom Break

Co-worker: This is the hard part. Yep, it still looks like tomato soup.

5801 South Wintersburg Road
Tonopah, Arizona

Posted on September 16, 2014
Arizona, Coworkers, Meals and Snacks

In Totally Unrelated News, Whatever Happened to Jen from Human Resources?

Lady accountant: I'm getting fat!
French accountant: Fat?! What are you talking about?! I could eat you and no one would notice! (awkward silence) Actually, pretend I didn't say that.

Baltimore, Maryland

Overheard by: Not an Accountant

Posted on September 15, 2014
Diet & Weight, Financial Folk, Maryland, Meals and Snacks, Physical Appearance, Questions, Sexuality, Weirdness

Same Person Who Put the Ram in the Rama Lama Ding Dong?

Loud, angry voice from breakroom: Who forked the peanut butter?

Pearl, Mississippi

Overheard by: Brain Dancing

Posted on September 15, 2014
Anger management, Coworkers, Default, Meals and Snacks, Mississippi, Questions

…Dear Liza, Dear Liza

Admin, to herself: The acorn has a condom in it.

Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania

Posted on September 14, 2014
Admins, Meals and Snacks, Pennsylvania, Sexuality, Weirdness

To Talk about It, on the Other Hand…

Suit #1: So, you feeling better today?
Suit #2: Man, I’m never eating Indian again.
Suit #1: Can’t have been that bad.
Suit #2: It’s just not manly to pee out your bum.

Hospital
England

Posted on September 14, 2014
Meals and Snacks, Suits, UK

A Dirty Mind Makes Otherwise Dull Days Bearable

Female coworker: Anybody need anything? I'm going to go down to the vending machines, I need a little protein with my carb this morning.
(male coworker gives a suggestive chuckle)
Female coworker: Nothin' outta you! (pause) Wait…crap, I didn't mean it that way!

Minneapolis, Minnesota

Overheard by: jearu