Dumb Customers

Hotel guest: I started taking that Trimspa about a month ago. I haven’t lost any weight, but my chest is huge!

State and Division Street
Chicago, Illinois

Overheard by: Sara G

Loud man complaining to librarian: Can you turn the heat up or the air conditioning down? It's too cold in here. It might be fine for someone with type o blood, but I'm freezing!

Public Library
La Jolla, California

Customer: Do I have to pay for that over the phone?
Customer service agent: Yes, ma’am.
Customer: Do you take cash?

Glenwood Raleigh, North Carolina

Overheard by: suse

Sandwich artist: What kind of sandwich do you want?
Guy: I’m a vegetarian, so I want the veggie sub.
Sandwich artist: What items do you want on it?
Guy: Everything in the picture… And throw some chicken on there.
Sandwich artist: You can’t have chicken on that! Chicken is meat!
Guy: Chicken ain’t meat! Just put it on there!

Subway
Charlotte, North Carolina

Customer: And what are your hours?
Leasing rep: We’re open from 10 to 6.
Customer: So could I do 6:30?
Leasing rep: No, we close at 6.
Customer: Oh, okay, I guess that’ll work then.

Randallstown, Maryland

Overheard by: tkap

Customer: I know you wouldn’t carry Jell-O, but do you have something exactly like it but called something else?

Whole Foods
Silver Spring, Maryland

Operator: Thank you for calling Bayshore Medical Insurance*; how can I assist?
Caller: So who are you?
Operator: We’re an insurance company.
Caller: And what do you do?
Operator: We help you with your insurance.
Caller: I don’t understand.
Operator: Well, your boss gives you benefits for working there, and our job is to help you use your benefits.
Caller: I don’t have any benefits! I never signed up for this! Did my boss tell you to call me? Is he trying to set me up? Who told you to call me?
Operator: Sir, you called me.

Market Street
San Francisco, California

Overheard by: The Man

Angry man about faulty hard drive: Don’t tell me it’s empty when there’s shit on it! Shit is shit and empty is empty! This thing is lying to me like the White House!

Electronics store, 2721 East 3rd Street
Bloomington, Indiana

Overheard by: Tony

Customer: Will this XBox game work on a Playstation 2?
Salesperson: No.
Customer: Well, I will try it, but if it doesn’t can I return it?

Clarke Crescent
Perth, Western Australia

Overheard by: Kiran

Customer: These new labels are awful. Just awful! Why did you change them? I hate them.
Pharmacist: I’m sorry, sir, but I don’t have any control over the labels.
Customer: They don’t even tell me when it’s time to refill my ‘scription. When am I supposed to refill my ‘scription?
Pharmacist: … When you run out of medication, sir.
Customer: Well, how in the hell am I supposed to know that?

CVS/Pharmacy
High Point, North Carolina