Man: Oh, Janice*, you didn't sign my birthday card?
Girl: No, sorry, but I'll sign it now.
Man: Okay, I'll go get it.
Girl: But I have to warn you, I won't have anything good to say!
Canadensis, Pennsylvania
Man: Oh, Janice*, you didn't sign my birthday card?
Girl: No, sorry, but I'll sign it now.
Man: Okay, I'll go get it.
Girl: But I have to warn you, I won't have anything good to say!
Canadensis, Pennsylvania
Female #1: I really want to get some new boots for winter.
Female #2: Me too. But I think I'm too short and stocky to wear them. I don't want to end up looking like Puss In Boots!
Costa Mesa, California
Annoying boss: Oh my gosh, I just talked to my daughter and it's such a chore talking to her because she goes on and on. It's so annoying!
Male coworker: I wonder where she gets that from.
Phoenix, Arizona
Coworker on phone: I'll slap your wobbly bits!
Auckland
New Zealand
Man entering another man's office with lunch: Can I look at you while I eat?
Government office, Washington, DC
Creative director: Okay, well… just… put it on the back burner for now. And maybe it will go away.
Art director: I like where your head is at.
Ad agency
Hudson Valley, New York
Overheard by: Staci Lynn
Cook, talking to counter person: I thought he was going to go throw up again, but I guess we needed sirloin.
Columbias
Lexington, Kentucky
Overheard by: 500lb Gorilla
Dude #1, at urinal: Shouldn’t we have two different organs for peeing and reproducing?
Dude #2: Submit a design change request to god.
Bangalore
India
Manager to worker on phone with customer: Tell him we ain't got a monkey, and don't know when the stock's coming in.
Hemel Hempstead
England
Overheard by: Do we sell monkeys?
