Cubicle drone to neighbor: They don't want to be dicks. It's like they want us to be their surrogate dicks.
Redmond, Washington
Cubicle drone to neighbor: They don't want to be dicks. It's like they want us to be their surrogate dicks.
Redmond, Washington
Grunt: It’s a sad day when you can’t bite someone.
1056 Home Avenue
Akron, Ohio
Woman to friend: I don’t mind telling you — I have just recently accepted Jesus into my life as my personal savior and salvation, and my life has changed so much. I mean, look — I got a Lincoln Continental!
Starbucks, 2300 Mendocino Avenue
Santa Rosa, California
Overheard by: Thankful to God for other reasons
Male coworker, after being given a fresh donut: I don't think I could be anymore of your friend than I am right now.
Female coworker: Yeah, it just peaked out.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Doughnut King
Male buyer: Did you take care of Tina's Johnson?
Female buyer: (blank stare)
Male buyer: Well, that didn't sound right now, did it?
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Cupcake
Worker bee: Does Anal Cunt have a MySpace page?
1500 Sansom Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: dmac
Male coworker #1 to male coworker #2: Hands up! No nipple action!
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Jefferson
Female coworker: How old is your girlfriend's son?
Male coworker: 17. He sometimes sleeps in bed with her.
Female coworker: What? What?!
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Grossed Out
Coworker to office: Woo-hoo! I'm almost done with my list! Then I'm going to have a little party with myself! Um… That didn't sound good.
Seattle, Washington
Candidate: At my last job, our supervisors drilled it into us that we had to document everything we designed.
Interviewer: And what was the purpose of documenting your designs?
Candidate: They were getting ready to fire us.
47 Mall Drive
Commack, New York
