3PM Cigarette Break

Admin: Hey, Simon Wiesenthal died! Who’s he?
Suit: Oh, he hunted Nazis or something. Cool!
Admin: Cool that he died?
Suit: Cool that he’s in my dead pool!

1600 Broadway
Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: C. O’ntracter

Posted on May 21, 2022
Admins, Colorado, Comebacks, Compliments, Death, General Idiocy, Suits

And I’m Going to Be Completely Rigid about This

Old maid boss: Do you have a boner over there?
Young male worker, confused: I’m sorry, what?
Old maid boss: A boner. For folding paper [holds up knife]. Do you have one?
Young male worker: How can you seriously be calling it that? I know you know what that means.
Old maid boss: No, I know you need one if you don’t have one. I’ll get another one.
Young male worker: I know you know what that means. I know you know what that means. I don’t want anything to do with it.

6101 O’Connell Avenue
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Overheard by: TK

Posted on May 16, 2022
Bosses and Underlings, Colorado, Possible Sexual Harassment

So Do I Have the Job or What?

Chick: Sometimes I chew with my mouth open just for effect.

Denver, Colorado

Overheard by: aireiq

Posted on May 2, 2022
Body Parts, Colorado, Employees, Sexuality, Weirdness

On the Plus Side, It's Like an EZ Pass to Paternity Suits

Crime scene tech, teaching a class: No, semen doesn't last. The sperm do. It's really hard to get rid of them, even after a few days. It's those tough little heads. You could put the clothes in the laundry and still find some. So…sorry ladies.

Las Vegas Street
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Posted on April 25, 2022
Clothes, Colorado, Sexuality, Tech People, Weirdness

Have You Ever Seen a Horse Slip on a Banana Peel? Disaster

Office peon on phone: … It’s almost like you’re putting the monkey before the horse.

S. Lima Street
Englewood, Colorado

Posted on April 5, 2022
Advice, Animals, Colorado, Compare and contrast, Education, Employees, General Idiocy, On the phone, Words

5PM That’s a Wrap

Employee: Hey! Doesn’t your ma get you anything from the Easter bunny?
Supervisor: It’s been years since I’ve gotten anything.
Employee’s boy: You live with your mom?
Supervisor: So what? So do you!
Employee’s boy: No, I don’t.
Supervisor: Huh?…Oh…Ah, shit.

6101 Wetzel Avenue
Fort Carson, Colorado

Posted on March 22, 2022
Bosses, Colorado, Employees, Family, General Idiocy, Holidays, Kids

2PM Managers’ Meeting

Manager: I’m sorry that was a dumb question, I just didn’t have enough to eat before lunch.

1005 17th Street
Denver, Colorado

Posted on December 3, 2021
Colorado, Dumb Bosses, General Idiocy, Meals and Snacks

Worst. Tooth Fairy. Ever.

Diner: Well, you know, when she was young she just liked to sleep with dead animals under her pillow.

Denver, Colorado

Posted on October 17, 2021
Age and ageing, Animals, Colorado, Death, Employees, Weirdness

I Think We'll Both Be Disappointed

Coworker, looking for food: Can I go through your drawers and find something to snack on?

Englewood, Colorado

Posted on September 2, 2021
Colorado, Coworkers, Meals and Snacks, Questions

Which Is Part of the Reason I’ve Been Fired

Worker bee: It’s like he’s a totally different person. I’m not sure if it’s him or if he’s been taken over by aliens. I keep checking him for anal probes.

Denver, Colorado

Posted on August 12, 2021
Colorado, Coworkers, Gossip