Worker #1: Man, I’m having a hard time since I’ve had to write about me. Do you have any suggestions?
Worker #2: I don’t know. It’s been a long time since I’ve had to sell myself.
900 Washington Avenue
Waco, Texas
Supervisor to file clerk: You know, I really don’t see you in the corporate workplace at all… I see you somewhere doing something violent like the American Gladiators or something.
101 South 5th Street
Louisville, Kentucky
Overheard by: Candice
Cube rat #1: Hey, didn’t they have one of those money-tubes here at the Thanksgiving party last year?
Cube rat #2: Yeah, where you jump in and catch the money? I got 20 bucks!
Cube rat #1: Hmmm. They should do something festive for the holiday… like canned hams in the tube!
2131 3rd Avenue
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Amused
Manager: Did you get a response back from that email you sent to the buyer yet?
Co-worker: No; I didn’t ask her for one. She knew what action I took and if she didn’t agree with me, she can call me.
Manager: No, no. You should always include “please advise” in the email, in case they don’t receive the email.
8000 Bent Branch Drive
Irving, Texas
Female co-worker #1: So my ob-gyn has been seeing all these young girls for their annuals this summer. She was amazed at how much sex they’re having. Like 2 to 3 times a day. She had to tell them they had to stop having intercourse for a month so the Pill could take effect, and they say, “What are we supposed to do all summer?” She was shocked.
Female co-worker #2: How old are these girls?
Female co-worker #1: She said they’re between 17 and 20 years old.
Female co-worker #2: Geez. Even if I had time to have sex 2 times a day, I’d have better things to do!
Female co-worker #1: Yeah, like clean up after my teenagers!
Motor Vehicle Building
Trenton, New Jersey
Overheard by: Not getting any either
Intern to another: You can get a lot of blow for an AK.
Toronto
Canadia
Female professional: If you push hard enough, you can get me to eat just about anything.
Marlborough, Massachusetts
Cube rat #1: You’ve got to be shitting me… My grandma is trying to add me on MySpace.
Cube rat #2: That’s sort of sweet.
Cube rat #1: I’m her second friend. I didn’t know she knew what a computer was…
Cube rat #2: Dude, pop her comment cherry!
1932 Wildcat Canyon Road
San Diego, California
Ad Design #1: I’m having trouble of sleeping and was thinking of getting Ambien.
Ad Design #2: You’re too young to take sleeping pills. Have you tried crack?
151 West 34th Street
New York, NY
Overheard by: Sarah
Office grunt: … And that’s why you should only have stupid children.
Camden Street
Baltimore, Maryland
