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9AM But There's No Cure for Bureaucracy
Fat coworker: Dude, all these re-orgs and manager changes really suck.
Skinny coworker: You know what else sucks? Polio.
Ontario Street
Cleveland, Ohio
Overheard by: The loud one
5PM Arthur Andersen's Enduring Legacy
Senior accountant to auditors: Well, you see I am just not that good with numbers.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Receptionist
4PM A Lovely Little Medium-Security B&B in Connecticut
Maintenance guy: I'll tell you. Back when I was in prison, at first, I couldn't sleep because of all the noise. But I got so used to it that now I can't sleep when it's quiet.
Boss: When you were where?
Senlac Drive
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Need to call the Temp Agency
3PM He Was Way Too Generous with Those Loaves and Fishes
Office peon: Not that I believe Jesus was Jewish or anything.
Silver Spring, Maryland
2PM She's Gonna Earn Her Salary Today
Office worker on speakerphone: Hello.
Creepy customer: I was just sitting here eating some creamed corn and thinking about you so I thought that I would give you a call.
Office worker: Please hold and I will transfer you to my supervisor.
1st Avenue
Birmingham, Alabama
1PM Ooh, or Maybe a Wicker Chair
Coworker eating twig cereal: I have eaten so much fiber today, when I get home, I'm gonna crap a wicker basket.
Rochester, New York
12PM The Walls Seem to Appreciate That Arrangement
Office lady: How can you drink that much Red Bull?
Computer nerd: I don't know, you build up a tolerance.
Office lady: If I drank that much I'd be whacking off the walls.
Computer nerd: Umm, you'd do what?
117th St
Broomfield, Colorado
Overheard by: The other nerd
11AM These Days, Everyone I Work With Is on Antidepressants
55-year-old post-menopausal help desk woman: I used to have naughty dreams about Simon & Simon, back in the day.
Glen Hendren Drive
Liberty, Missouri
Overheard by: RickyB
10AM After You Finish Crying
Security guy: I could be an officer, you know.
Sarge: Oh, shut the fuck up.
Security guy: No, really. It's just politics stopping me! Just politics!
Sarge: Oh, is Rudy fucking Giuliani preventing you from becoming a police officer? Why don't you fucking explain that to all of us?
Public Safety
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Shaye
9AM It's Burning a Cross on My Palm
Nurse #1: And I don't know. I just started having this anxiety attack.
Nurse #2: Well, on the bright side, I just made a Klan hood for my finger.
Royal Oak, Michigan
5PM Especially When It's Deja Vu of Making Copies
Peon, to no one: When you have deja vu more than once a day, you know you have a fucking boring job.
Omaha, Nebraska
4PM ...According to This Letter of Recommendation.
Cube rat: Jason* is a pretty good guy... for a racist homophobe.
Senlac Drive
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: Is That All?
3PM It Sounds Like a Delicious Cocktail
Girl #1: Do you like Carly Simon?
Girl #2: I don't know what that is.
Canal and Broadway
New York City, New York
2PM Not His Fault Your Name Is Satyanarayanikinskahoveniska
Woman #1: So he called me his ex's name during a fight last night.
Woman #2: I hate it when that happens.
Woman #1: I don't really care... As long as it doesn't happen during sex... But then it hardly lasts long enough for him to say any name, let alone the wrong one.
Microsoft Way
Redmond, Washington
Overheard by: ouch!
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