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3PM ...to a Neoclassical One.
Cube rat, talking about upcoming office picnic: I dunno man, I've always preferred a traditional keg stand.
New Jersey
Overheard by: looking forward to the festivities
2PM Didn't You Used to Work in Ohio?
Coworker: The back door isn't working.
Receptionist: Oh, yeah, the card thing isn't working. It'll be fixed soon.
Coworker: How do we get into the lab from the outside, then?
Receptionist: You'll have to use the door on the other side and go around. Sorry for the incontinence.
Lancaster, California
1PM And Why Do Their Offices Always Have That Strange Herbal Smell?
Manager: Who's Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young? Are they a law firm?
Toronto
Canadia
11AM Mr. Petri Shouldn't Dish in the Office
Coworker to another: I can't wait to see your wife's baby making place.
Atlanta, Georgia
10AM My Kind Of Girl!
Office worker #1: Marta's got a heart-on!
Office worker #2: What?
Office worker #1: A heart. She's wearing a heart necklace! She has a heart necklace on today.
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: E.
9AM Another Hard Day at the Ministry Of Truth
Cubicle dweller #1: Do any animals eat humans?
Cubicle dweller #2: Uh, lets see... What does a koala eat?
Washington, DC
5PM Unless You're Pauly Shore.
Manager; You don't stick your tongue on a 9-volt battery every day.
Boston, Massachusetts
4PM The Reverse Is a Lot Creepier.
Coworker: These shoes fit me so tight, it feels like my foot is inside a vagina.
Ssilverdale, Washington
Overheard by: holy awkward
3PM ...Oh, You Mean That I'm Anal?
Analyst on phone: It's his equipment. I'll shove it in there if it's his equipment. (pause) What do you mean, "that's what they heard about me?"
Skokie, Illinois
2PM Spike Lee: "Excuse Me?"
Coworker to another: It's not up to you to do the right thing.
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: anoyed
1PM We're All Scared Of the X-File
Finance clerk: Every time she comes in here, he grabs it and pulls it out, and she runs away.
Vienna, Virginia
Overheard by: Receptionitis
11AM Jared Was Banned from Biology Class for Life
Peon #1: He was basically using the frog as a Fleshlight.
Peon #2: What's a Fleshlight?
Allston, Massachusetts
10AM The Same Answer Given by the Constructors Of the New World Trade Center
Senior professor: So, Vladimir*, when will this project be finished?
PhD student: Time is a... dynamic thing!
University of Leuven
Belgium
9AM I'd Punch You If I Had Any Arms!
Receptionist: Some people have no arms because their mothers were booze hounds.
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Proud of my mom for giving me all of my limbs
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