Southeast

HR clerk: Maureen* broke another chair. Should I order her another chair designed for a person over three hundred pounds, or should I order an even stronger chair?
Manager: No! I am going to tell the maintenance guys to put her desk up on blocks! Then, I am going to tell Maureen that her job description has changed! She is now required to stand up to do her job!
[manager leaves] HR clerk: Well, it is not going to be me that tells him that one of the toilets in the women’s restroom is broken.

5760 Highway 80
Pearl, Mississippi

Overheard by: Brain Dancing

Employee: Welcome back. Are you feeling better?
Supervisor: Well, I am fully clothed.

1930 Bishop Lane
Louisville, Kentucky

Overheard by: Eve’s Dropper

Black co-worker: Hey, how are you doing today?
Redneck co-worker: If I were you, I wouldn’t speak to me today.
Black co-worker: Why is that? What’s wrong with you?
Redneck co-worker: I’m not too fond of you black people today. That damn Tiger Woods has won another Major.
Black co-worker: Oh, that’s all? Well, what are you going to do when we take over NASCAR?
Redneck co-worker: [Bewildered silence]

1000 Jerry St. Pe Highway
Gulf Coast, Mississippi

Overheard by: The Guy sitting next to the idiot

Office manager: What is this book on my desk? Who left this here? Kiss of the Wolf?
Sales guy: I have no idea, do you want to speculate here?
Office manager: Didn’t this use to be in the girl’s bathroom?

8220 England Street
Charlotte, North Carolina

Smart guy: I sent a copy of that e-mail out to the S&M guys, too.
Conference call audience: Okay, sounds good.

Progress Boulevard
Alachua, Florida

Overheard by: Cramped office-mate

Woman on phone: What do you mean, you never thought you would get caught in a stolen car?!

Columbia Business Park
Columbia, South Carolina

Girl #1: So I was about to put my tongue in…
Girl #2: Ew, was it hairy?
Girl #1: Yeah, but his mom called, so I didn’t have to.

College office
Gainesville, Florida

Overheard by: uh…