Female employee, after answering question: Sorry I couldn't give you a more stimulating answer.
Male boss: That's okay, I'm stimulating myself enough anyway.
(awkward silence)
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: walkingawaygiggling
Female employee, after answering question: Sorry I couldn't give you a more stimulating answer.
Male boss: That's okay, I'm stimulating myself enough anyway.
(awkward silence)
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: walkingawaygiggling
Cashier, holding up a coupon: I’ll just have to take off your panties.
Victoria’s Secret, Green Tree Mall
Clarksville, Indiana
Overheard by: The next one in line
Scatter-brained boss: Oh! Can I touch it?
Subordinate: Um.
Scatter-brained boss: Would you like to touch mine?
Fairfax, Virginia
Coworker on phone: What?! Suck on it?! No, never! I would never suck on it… I’ve used my hands and fingers, but I would never put that in my mouth! We’re not animals! [Hangs up and notices coworkers staring. Turns out it was about cleaning a newborn’s nose.]
3 Park Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: the quiet one
Girl, shutting down printer: I'm gonna turn you off.
Creepster: Negative.
Costa Mesa, California
Analyst: The problem, though, is that it’s not child pornography — just the regular kind.
16340 North Scottsdale Road
Scottsdale, Arizona
Female admin: What were you doing here at 7:40?
Male admin: I was rummaging through your stuff.
Female admin: Find anything of interest? My stuff is pretty boring.
Male admin: Really? I found that riding crop quite interesting.
Female admin: What?! I ride horses!!
Male admin: That would explain the saddle.
80 Grasslands Road
Elmsford, New York
Overheard by: Bored Beyond Belief
Secretary: What I’d give for an eight-year-old vagina again…
Orange County, California
Employee on phone: You couldn’t pay your dick three thousand dollars to work!
Madison Avenue
New York, New York
Overheard by: jen
Male coworker #1: So, what do you even do back there, Allen*?
Male coworker #2: Apart from sifting through all of that mail.
Male coworker #1: And making photocopies.
Allen: Watch porn and whack off.
Male coworker #1, laughing: Seriously?
Allen: Hell yeah.
Male coworker #1: Dude. You’re my idol.
Office on 48th Avenue
New York, New York
