Something I Would Advise Against

20-something woman to 50-something man: I am not telling you what a Dirty Sanchez is. If you’re so interested just Google it!

Oak Park, Michigan

Posted on July 15, 2015
Advice, Consultants, Michigan

During an Office Fire, Some Employees Will Run Directly into the Flames

Coworker #1: Where are we supposed to meet for the tornado drill?
Coworker #2: Beth* said that we can just stay at our desks because we’re already in the basement. She’ll come around and do a head count.
Coworker #1: So we don’t have to go outside, then?
Coworker #2: Um… no.

7000 Portage Road
Kalamazoo, Michigan

Overheard by: Snark Monster

Posted on July 11, 2015
Dumb Employees, General Idiocy, Michigan

You're Turning Violet, Violet!

Peon: Oh my god! Who made the coffee?
Secretary: I did. What's wrong with it?
Peon: This stuff is like liquid crack!
Secretary: You're such a sissy. You added half a cup of blueberry creamer!
Peon: Seriously, I think I'm having chest pains. Call 911!

Bangor, Michigan

Overheard by: Love my coffee

Posted on July 5, 2015
Admins, Dumb Employees, Health & Hygiene, Insults, Meals and Snacks, Michigan, Questions

Good Thing Love Conquers All

New bride: So now I am changing my last name to Smith.
Negative co-worker: Oh! You will have problems with identity theft with that name… It's so common.
New bride: Oh no, it's okay, I put my old drivers license in the safety deposit box.

Crooks Road
Troy, Michigan

Posted on July 4, 2015
Advice, Coworkers, Default, General Idiocy, Michigan, Names

Even After I Gave You That Backrub?

Smarmy boss to teenage peon: How are you doing, Veronica*?
Teenage peon: I hate you passionately!

Plymouth, Michigan

Posted on July 1, 2015
Bosses and Underlings, Feelings, Michigan, Questions

But That’s Public Service, Isn’t It?

Legislative aide: I just wouldn’t want to be in the middle of a threesome. You have to keep going in and out, in and out…

House of Representatives Seat Selection, Michigan State Capitol
Lansing, Michigan

Posted on June 29, 2015
Admins, Michigan, Possible Sexual Harassment

But You’re Certainly Correct about Her Gargantuan Gazongas

Male intern, about passing coworker: Wow… Those were some tremendous titties.
Female manager: Okay, so you know I’m your manager, right? You probably shouldn’t say ‘titties’ to me.

Plymouth, Michigan